Page 69 of Strictly Solo
Ruhaan paced the length of his room he had stormed back once Naina and Neil left. How had everything spiraled out of control so quickly? One moment, he was watching Neil in the hallway, and the next, the boy was asking him to be his father in front of everyone. He hadn’t expected it…he hadn’t expected any of this.
The way Neil had run to him, clutching his waist, looking up at him with those big, innocent eyes, full of hope, had left him utterly frozen. He hadn’t known what to say, how to respond. His mind had gone blank, and the room, filled with so many watchful eyes, had seemed to close in on him.
He punched his fist against the wall, cursing himself. How could he have just stood there,speechless? How could he have let Neil and Naina down like that?
He clenched his fists, the pain from the impact on the wall grounding him, but it didn’t ease the ache in his chest. The look on Naina’s face, the way her eyes had filled with tears as she watched him stand there, paralyzed by indecision, haunted him.She had hoped for something from him…an answer, a sign…but instead, he had given her silence. And now it tore him apart.
“Why couldn’t I just say something? Anything?” he muttered to himself with frustration.
He ran his hand through his hair, the frustration mounting with each passing second. He knew his bond with Neil had been growing stronger. He loved the boy, genuinely loved him. But being asked, in front of everyone, to be his father had thrown him off balance. It wasn’t that he didn’t care for Neil or didn’t want to be in his life, but the weight of that question, of that responsibility, had stunned him. And now, he hated himself for not being able to respond the way Neil deserved.
He had seen the tears in boy’s eyes, the hurt and confusion that crushed him. He had seen the devastation in Naina’s gaze as she pulled her son away, as if that was the final straw, the breaking point she hadn’t been expecting but had feared all along.
Ruhaan punched the wall again, this time harder. He had caused Naina and Neil pain. He had let down Neil and Naina in the worst way possible. But how was he supposed to be ready for something so monumental when he hadn’t even figured out his own feelings yet?
He sank down on the bed, his elbows resting on his knees as he buried his face in his hands. He knew he had to figure this out. This wasn’t just about him and Naina anymore. Neil was involved, too. That little boy had trusted him, and he had shattered that trust.
“I’m such an idiot,” he muttered under his breath, the regret twisting in his chest. He wanted to fix it, to make things right, but he didn’t know how. He had never been faced with something like this before. His whole life, he had avoided responsibility, avoided commitment. And now, when it wasstaring him in the face, when it was wrapped up in the two people he cared most about, he had no idea how to handle it.
Chapter 20
An hour later
For more than an hour Ruhaan had locked himself up in this room wondering how to face Naina and Neil again. It was too late now to go back and change the past. He couldn’t undo what had been done, or worse, what hadn’t been done. All he cared about now was seeing Naina and Neil, ensuring that they were okay. He knew they wouldn’t be, not after his failure to act, but at the very least, he had to try. He had to face them, even if he didn’t have an answer to Neil’s question. He had to make sure they were fine, even if he wasn’t sure how to fix things yet.
Just as he reached for the doorknob, his mother appeared in the doorway.
“Ruhaan, what’s the matter with you? You haven’t even showered yet!” she scolded, glancing at his disheveled state. “You’re supposed to take Poonam and her family to the railway station. Their train leaves in an hour!”
He had completely forgotten his mother had mentioned it yesterday. But he had no intention of dropping Poonam’s family at the station, not when his heart was set on seeing Naina and Neil. Yesterday, he had agreed, just to get his mother off his back, but now? Now, he couldn’t think of anything else but getting to them.
“Mom,” Ruhaan said, “ask someone else to drop them or book a cab. I can’t go. I have to go... somewhere.”
Kaushalya’s eyes narrowed.
“Somewhere? What do you mean, ‘somewhere’? You promised me yesterday you’d drop them. They’re expecting you! How could you even think of backing out now? What do you expect me to tell them?”
Ruhaan rubbed his temples, feeling the pain, the awkwardness, the confrontation he needed to have with Naina and Neil. He just wanted to get there, to rip off the band-aid and face it head-on. But his mother’s persistent voice dragged him back to the present.
“Mom, please. This is important,” he said, edging toward the door. “I’ll make it up to you, but right now I can’t—”
Suddenly, Kaushalya grabbed his arm. Her grip was stronger than he expected, and the hurt in her eyes made him pause.
“How can you let your mother down like this? I gave my word to Poonam’s family based on your promise. Now, what am I supposed to tell them? That my son can’t keep his word? That my son doesn’t care about my honor?” Her voice wavered, but she wasn’t done. “This morning… whatever happened… it’s already been enough embarrassment for me. Don’t make it worse. Don’t make me beg.”
He hated seeing his mother pleading. Yes, his priority was Naina and Neil right now, but how could he turn his back on his mother?
“Fine,” he muttered, taking the car keys from the small table by the door. “I’ll drop them.”
Saying that he marched out, promising himself that as soon as this was done, he would go to Naina and Neil. He had to. There was no other option.
The ride to the station was agonizing. Poonam and her family were in high spirits, chatting away about their trip and plans, oblivious to the storm raging inside Ruhaan. His mind was miles away, with Naina, wondering how she was feeling, how hurt shemust be. And Neil… Neil, who had trusted him, looked up to him. How could he have let him down so badly?
He smiled politely at Poonam and her family, nodded when necessary, but his heart wasn’t in it. All he could think of was Naina’s face as she teared up this morning. Would she hate him? Would Neil?
The train, of course, was delayed. What should have been a quick drop-off turned into a two-hour ordeal. Poonam’s family insisted that Ruhaan wait with them, and though he tried to excuse himself, they wouldn’t hear of it. He was forced to stay, helping them with their luggage, enduring more small talk, all while the minutes slipped away.
By the time he finally left the station, his nerves were frayed. The moment he got back in the car, he gripped the steering wheel tightly, as if holding onto it could somehow anchor his chaotic thoughts. He was desperate to get to Naina and Neil, but then, of course,traffic. A small accident had caused a backup, and the honking of impatient drivers around him only made his frustration worse.
