Page 70 of For One Moment With You
‘It wasn’t.’ I leave out the part about my meltdowns and drinking Gareth’s whisky; how my friend Elena had to virtually wrestle my wedding photos away from me. ‘When I found out, I decided to go away. I didn’t know what I was doing, to be honest. So I bought a one-way ticket to San Jose.’
‘Wow.’ But instead of looking impressed as I’d hoped he would, Adam looks taken aback. ‘You won’t believe this, but I was living in San Jose until a few weeks ago. I was working out there.’ He stares at me. ‘How weird is that?’
I stare back at him. ‘Do you know what’s weirder still? It’s that you were there and now you’re here.’ My head is starting to spin again.
Adam frowns. ‘So if you were going to San Jose, how come you ended up here?’
‘My flight was cancelled – the whole country was fogged out that day. I couldn’t bear to stay in England, so I got on a train to Paris. Then from there, I went to Barcelona. Oh my God…’
‘What is it?’ Adam looks concerned.
‘I thought I saw you while I was there. In Barcelona. You were there too.’ I stare at him in disbelief.
He shakes his head. ‘That wasn’t me you saw. But actually, my brother lives there. Maybe it was him?’
‘Your brother?’ I look at him, firstly incredulous, then secondly relieved that I didn’t make a complete and utter fool of myself.
‘Then you came here.’ Adam looks uncertain. ‘Just randomly?’
‘Completely. Well, I stopped at a few places along the way.’ I gaze into his eyes. ‘What brought you here?’
‘I bought an apartment several years ago – not far from the harbour. I come here when I want to escape.’ He pauses. ‘But actually, I have a confession to make. It wasn’t entirely an accident that I found you in the rain. I’d gone to look for you.’
‘For me?’ I screw up my face; this is getting weirder by the minute. ‘But how did you know I was here?’
‘I saw you with the old man when he collapsed. You know – the night the ambulance came out. You were with a Greek guy though, so I kind of thought I’d leave you alone – you seemed really friendly with him.’
‘But that would just have been Nicos,’ I say, aghast. ‘He owns the bar.’
‘I know who he is now.’ Adam is smiling. ‘I just didn’t want to get in the way of true love – again.’
‘Love?’ Staring at him, I feel my heart start to race. ‘You have to be kidding. You’ve got this all wrong. You see…’ I tail off as beside me, one of the machines starts to bleep. Instantly, one of the nurses comes over.
‘Your heart is beating too fast,’ she says crossly. ‘You must be calm, Tilly. This…’ She points to the machine. ‘This is not good. And you…’ She points at Adam. ‘You must leave. Now, please.’
‘No,’ I say hastily. ‘I don’t want him to go just yet.’
‘I am afraid he has to,’ she says firmly. ‘I am in charge here. If you want to get well, you must do as I say.’
‘Is everything OK?’ Getting up, Adam sounds worried.
‘Tilly will be fine. Please.’ She tries to usher him towards the door.
He meets my eyes briefly. ‘I’d better do as I’m told. You had, too.’ He pauses. ‘I’ll come back tomorrow – if that’s OK?’
‘Yes.’ But as he heads for the door, I’m realising just how much I want him to stay.
‘It is important you rest,’ the nurse scolds. ‘These affairs of the heart, they are not good for you.’
‘Tell me about it,’ I say heavily. ‘They have always been seriously, and I meanseriously, bad for me.’
‘Then this must change,’ she says quietly. ‘That man…’ She nods after Adam’s retreating back. ‘He is a good one. I can tell. No more bad men, Tilly.’
I gaze at her, slightly shocked at how she’s summed it up; that she has the measure of Adam. But she’s right. He is a good man.
Satisfied my bleeping has settled down again, she leaves me to rest. Lying there, I listen to her footsteps as she marches away. But as I think about life choices, it’s true that not everything presents itself when you need it. Or maybe it does and you just don’t see it at the time. But also, there’s the question of how you look at it. There’s the possibility also that sometimes there’s some shit to wade through first.
A sigh comes from me. Am I on my way to the good part? One of these days, am I going to leap out of bed, newly invigorated, a new Tilly, ready to embrace the rest of my life?
