Page 56 of For One Moment With You
That day, as the ferry rumbled on, needing a caffeine hit, I got up and went to buy a coffee. It was amazing how tiring doing nothing could be. But maybe it depended on your definition of doing nothing. If you thought about it, the last few days had been the biggest transition I’d ever embarked on, away from my old life to exactly what, I still wasn’t sure.
OK. So, I did now have a plan, and that was to stay in Crete a while, however long that turned out to be. Beyond that… I didn’t know. But now wasn’t the time to think about that, I told myself firmly. Sipping my coffee, I got out my phone and texted Elena.
Tilly
I’m on the ferry, El, to Crete. It’s…
I broke off, not sure how to describe it, before carrying on:
Tilly
It’s the best thing I could have done. Everything to do with Gareth seems so far away. To be honest, all I want is to keep it like that. xxx
About ten minutes later, Elena replied.
Elena
So glad you’re doing this, Tills. Miss you. But so so proud of you.
She followed it with a heart emoji.
Sitting there, I started googling Crete, realising how many jaw-dropping sights there were to see, pleased to know there was plenty to do there.
It also looked like the perfect place to pick up a few little things for Robbie and Alex. One or two mementos of this trip – for the new home I’d eventually be moving into, further down the line.
But I was getting ahead of myself. One thing I was learning on my venture into the unknown was to take each day, each step, one at a time. The first was to find myself a place to stay. I imagined a tiny studio, tucked away up a narrow street, a short walk from the harbour at Chania; with blue shutters like you saw in travel photos, framing a window from which I could lean out and watch the world go by, catch a not-so-distant glimmer of the sea.
Sitting back, my mind flitted back and forth. Then it catapulted me back in time to the early days of my marriage. Gareth and I were so young – no older than our boys are. But now, I can’t help wondering were we too young? If we’d waited, would we have stayed together?
In my pocket, my phone buzzed. Taking it out, I read the text message, from Gareth.
Gareth
Call me, Tilly. We need to talk about the house. There’s been an offer.
Staring at the screen, I felt sick all of a sudden. Despite my brave words, underneath I was still coming to terms with the end of our marriage; had thought going away would buy me time to get my head around it. I’d envisaged months passing before anyone made an offer near the asking price, and while we were on the subject, the asking price was something Gareth had yet to enlighten me about.
Tilly
Thanks a whole bloody lot, Gareth. I thought you said we’d discuss when to market the house. You haven’t even told me what it’s been valued at.
I hesitated. There was so much more I wanted to say. Like how selfish he was, and that was just for starters. But I was questioning the point. This wasn’t anything new. The writing had been on the wall almost since day one. What was staggering was how I’d managed not to see it.
How the actual fuck did that happen?But you knew, didn’t you? I reminded myself, as, far away from home, I confronted the reality of that time.Think about those days before your wedding, Tilly. Remember how you weren’t sure you could go through with it? You knew, as long ago as then, that Gareth wasn’t right for you.
It was as though the sunlight had dimmed. It was a very long time, if ever, since I’d admitted the truth to anyone – let alone myself. But back then, nothing seemed easy. It was one thing to have doubts. But I’d made a commitment to Gareth. And I’d gone through with it; then unlike Gareth, I’d given our relationship my all.
Anyway, it was a bit late for recriminations. Twenty-two years too late, to be precise. Sending Gareth the message, I started googling property websites to see if our house had been listed, as almost straight away, Gareth replied.
Gareth
It isn’t on the market yet. The agent knows someone.
Did he indeed? Suspicious, I had the feeling there was something he wasn’t saying, that Gareth’s impatience to sell could end up costing both of us.
Tilly
Before I agree to anything, I’d like to know the valuation and the offer, Gareth. Send them through and we can talk about it. After all, there’s no rush.
