Page 62 of Wife Unwanted
"I-I'm not sure what you're talking about."
"Never having sex. I've tormented myself for years because of that rule."
"Carey."
He groaned low and captured my mouth with his. I was immobile as I let him take what I have secretly wanted him to take for so long. He started slow, but the heat immediately burned through us as his kiss became hungry and demanding. I clung to his chest, afraid I would crumble to the ground, but he held me firm against him as his lips tortured me with their sweetness. His allure was too strong for me to deny. I kissed him back with the same fervor he was giving me. It was unlike any of our fake made-for-tv kisses for public consumption. This was primal. Full of craving and need. My hands slid up to his neck and to his head so I could pull him down deeper. He groaned and pressed his crotch against mine. He turned me around and I found myself leaning against a tree while he covered my entire body with his. I've never been kissed like this. It felt as though he was desperate for something only I could give him.
A car whizzed past and honked. Startled, my sanity returned and with that strength enough to disengage and push him away. What are we doing? What am I doing? We were in the middle of the road, kissing each other like teenagers. I looked around, flushed and feeling ashamed as I fixed my clothes. Nothing was askew, but I still felt like I was caught naked.
Carey stared back like it was nothing. Like we hadn't been climbing all over each other a few seconds ago. Even his hair didn't look ruffled, even though I had my hands in it. "You should think about it?"
I saw my book lying on the ground and went to pick it up. "You and I kissing? No thanks. I got better things to occupy my brain with." Liar. Liar.
"Us having sex. One last hurrah before we say goodbye to each other forever."
"You're out of your mind."
He tipped his nose in the air. "What's the harm in it? I've just proven you want me as much as I want you."
There was plenty of harm. My heart, for starters. It had taken me years to put it back together again, and if I gave in to him again, he would destroy it. "All you've proven is you can maul a woman in the middle of the road."
He chuckled. "Don't pretend like you weren't climbing all over me."
I picked up my book, brushed the bag, and marched back onto the road. The further away I am from him, the better I could think. He was trying to ruffle my feathers, that all. Otherwise, why act like he wanted me when he had proven over the years that he found me repulsive? He recoiled at my touch and showed more interest in other women than he did in me.
Carey never tried to catch up to me. He was a few feet behind me until we reached the house. I rushed upstairs and went to the shower so I could wash away every trace of him on my lips andbody. He never tried came to the bedroom to my relief and when I came back downstairs from my shower, he wasn't in the house. He was gone.
Chapter 32
Thalia
IT WAS Aperfect day for fishing. The sun was bright, and the waters were calm. Arther and Carey had their rods in the water as they lounged on the deck, while Mae and I reclined on deck chairs a few feet away from the men. I was partially listening to Mae chatting about her son while my thoughts were preoccupied by what happened yesterday. The kiss. Why would he do that after all this time? He had ignored me, acted like I didn't exist, but now that I was leaving him, he was acting like he wants me.
My gaze traveled to him. Carey, like in everything he wore, looked handsome in his fishing gear, a complement I never thought I would give to anyone. Next to Arther, he looked like a model in some fishing magazine.
"Your husband is handsome," Mae giggled, pulling me out of my thoughts. And as if he felt us watching, Carey glanced in our direction. He smiled at me, and I returned the gesture by blowing him a kiss. He chuckled and turned back to the water. Mae sighed. "The way he looks at you. I wish Arther still looked at me like that."
I swiveled my head to her. She must have seen the frown on my face because she waved off dismissively and said, "I am not saying he doesn't love me. I know he does. But sometimes I wishhe would look at me like he wants to devour me." She slumped in her chair.
I drank my beer to hide my smile. If only that were true. Carey had a talent to turn a sneer into a look of love. At least Mae and Arther were buying the lie. Once this stay at Nantucket was over, I could leave him and never think about him ever again.
"So, are you thinking about children at all?" Mae said continuing our previous conversation. She spoke so loud that both Arther and Carey heard her.
"You must start now if you're thinking about it," Arther chimed in. "Trust me. You don't want to be mistaken for the grandparents at your child's graduation."
I looked at Carey for a signal. What was I supposed to say? Carey answered. "We wanted to wait. We've been enjoying each other's company so far." Mae and Arther would be forgiven for interpreting it as a man in love with his wife and can't keep his hands off her. The look Carey gave me was hot. That seemed to assuage them as theconversation moved on to fishing.
I finished my drink in silence as I listened to Arther pontificate about the best bait to catch a big fish. My drink depleted as the sun got hotter. I needed another drink. I checked the cooler, only to find it empty. There was a small fridge in the cabin. Carey had fully stocked it before we left, so I got up, picked up the cooler, and made my way to the cabin. The door to the cabin was on the other end of the deck. The waves were getting testy at this point and made walking on the boat harder. I went down to the cabin, filled up the cooler and climbed the two small steps back up, but as I was rounding back to where everyone else was, a wave rocked the boat. It was big enough to make me stumble, but small enough not to rock anyone sitting. My yelp attracted the attention of everyone, including Carey, who glanced over his shoulder at me with a furrowed brow.
"I'm fine!" I called out to them. The lid of the cooler had tipped open, however, and a couple of drinks had popped out and were rolling on the deck. I quickly picked them up, but as I was doing so, another wave rocked the boat. This one was bigger than the one before. I wasn't holding onto the rail this time around, and I failed to find my balance. I fell to my knees and slid to the edge of the boat. Great. At least I can reach the rail, I thought. But as I got up using the rail as support, another wave came and it tipped me over the boat. I screamed just as I went into the water. Upon hitting the water, I fought the rising panic, but as my lungs filled, one thought dominated my thoughts.I can't swim.I tried to float, but my legs felt heavy. The weight of the water pulled me down. My arms flailed in the water as I tried to swim and failing. Fuck. Is this how I die? Drowning while distant voices scream out my name. I heard a splash. Someone entered the waters. Carey was swimming over to me, but he was too slow. He was the last person I saw as I sunk.
Chapter 33
Carey
HER EYES FLUTTEREDfor a few seconds before opening wide. Then she started coughing. I drew her up so she could eliminate all the water that had filled her lungs. I let out a deep breath and felt sweat wash down my body. She was unresponsive for a minute, but it felt like hours. When I fished out of her limp body, I wasn't sure she was going to make it. The accident happened so quickly. One moment she was walking down the boat, the next a wave hit us and she was no longer there. I watched, as though in slow motion, as she went overboard. I don't think I wasted time getting into the water myself, remembering that she once said she couldn't swim. But we got hit by another wave and she was carried away by the water. Time stood still as I surveyed the area and saw nothing. That is until Arther pointed a few feet away from the boat where her slipper was floating. The wave had washed her further away. I swam as fast as I could to get to her before the water drowned her further.
When I got her to the boat, she was motionless. My heart beat so fast as I tried to give her mouth to mouth. Hoping and praying that she's fine. My life, for that brief moment, felt hopeless. I can't lose her, I kept thinking.
