Page 53 of Mixed Connection
“I want to introduce you to my Alma,” he says her name with so much love, with the same softness I use when I speak to my grandma.
He still has not fully let me in on his decision but with the small moment we just shared this feels like he’s back for good. The bar is quiet aside from the soft music playing in the background. Staff hustle around us, all in their own worlds as they wrap up last minute preparations.
“Can we talk somewhere more private?” Jamesone asks.
Fuck. This can’t be good. He wants to let me down easy and doesn’t want me to make a scene by bursting into tears in my own bar. Maybe he bought me the phone so we could try long distance. Fuck. I take in a small breath not wanting to get myself worked up before he says it himself and I roll my eyes at my own thoughts.
“Yeah, we can go to the office,” I say, as I open the counter and walk around.
He follows close behind me. Once we are in the office I close the door and offer him a chair at my desk. I take the seat next to him rather than behind my desk, not wanting this to feel like a business transaction.
“So, um, how is Alma?”
His lip quirks up at one side. “She’s doing well,” he says as he pulls out his phone, tapping on the screen before I hear a video call chime.
“Hey, Honey.” A soft voice comes through the line. “Have you made it back to your lovely girl yet? I was starting to think you gotpreoccupiedand wouldn’t call.”
“Yeah, Alma, I got her right here.” He talks to her in a gentle voice, the same voice I would use with my own grandma, one I need to call. He hands me the phone.
The old woman smiles warmly at me, her deep-brown eyes are soft and her voice is a quiet whisper as she speaks, still talking with Jameson as if it was him looking at her and not me. “She’s stunning Jameson. She’s everything you said and more.”
Taking in the space around her, it seems like she’s in her hospital room still. My eyes note the collar of the hospital gown and monitors near the back of her bed. I wouldn’t be able to tell though, her jet black hair is straightened in a braided top knot pillowed at the top of her head, not a single hair out of place. Her lipstick, a crimson red, enhances her golden tawny skin. She looks like royalty and I say a little prayer that I’ll look as good as she does when I’m her age.
“Cassidy, meet Alma. The love of my life.” His voice is mocking me now, “My eighty-seven year old girlfriend who likes Criminal Minds and bowling on Saturdays.”
“Don’t you start boy, you’re supposed to be making up. Ignore him, lovely. It’s a pleasure to finally meet you.” My lips fold in as I try to hold back my laugh.
“It’s really nice to meet you, Alma, though I wish it were a better circumstance. How are you feeling?” I ask her.
“I’m feeling good, better the moment I get to lie in my own bed away from the looky-loos in here.”
“I’m sure you will be home in no time!”
“And I can’t wait for it. I’m ready to scrub the floor with Helen.” She puffs her chest out best she can and continues. “She is my, um, bowling buddy. Nevermind Helen… Listen dear, he’s a foolish man who is head over heels for you, suga’. Now that I know he has made it back safely and I’ve met you, I think I’m going to get some rest,” she releases a yawn before saying goodbye along with asking me to hear him out. Jameson ends the call, setting the phone down on my desk and looks at me.
“I don’t want to be anywhere else, Babygirl.’’ His voice is light, welcoming me into a conversation. “After visiting Alma I realized how foolish I was to leave without telling you fully how I feel. After talking with Alma she made me see I was missing something, and that something was telling you I’m not goinganywhere. The house I’m renovating may be temporary but this, what we have,isnot.
“Remodeling, nomading myself around, those places aren’t my home,you are. Wherever you are is where I’m going to be, I need you to hear me in that. I need you to know that I am not leaving you. I want it all. I want the anger, the jokes, the dancing in the middle of the market like no one is there. I’m so sorry I didn’t make that more clear to you, that was never my intention.” He grabs both sides of my face, looking into my very soul before he continues, “I love you Cassidy Heart. You’re the blueprint… always have been, always will be. Every curve. Every dip. Every smirk. You’re it for me.”
“I’m so sorry I didn’t give you the chance to speak. That I didn’t listen to you. I just—” His words stop me, realizing he just told me he loved me, and he doesn’t give me another second to think and say it back before he pulls me onto his lap .
“I’m so sorry.” My apology is muffled now that my face is mushed into his chest. I breathe in his scent, willing it to fill me and be a balm to my foolishness. “I can grovel, if that’s what you want.”
His chest rumbles with laughter as his hand slides up the nape of my neck and into my hair, pulling my head back in a sharp angle so I can look at him eye to eye.
“I want you on your knees, but not to grovel.” His voice dips low, so low that it hits my panties. Like he never left. I’m weak for this man and now that I know what a fool I was, I need to make up for the lost time even if it was a short couple of days.
“We don’t have much time before your party starts but I need to take you upstairs. Show you just how much I missed you.” My body trembles at his words. I know we don’t have enough time to do much of anything, but having his hands on me is all I can think about at this point.
23
I never want space again.
Bulldozer
Good, because I don’t plan on giving you any.
We barely make it up the stairs before he’s lifting me into his arms. I wrap my legs around his waist and grind against him the best I can before his lips are on mine again. Fuck he feels so good. Everywhere his hands touch my body responds with growing heat and moans fall from my mouth.
