Page 124 of Fire Fight
“Let me see.”
Slowly, he withdrew his hand and presented me with what he held: a coiled length of black rope.
As soon as the rope appeared, I flinched, unable to school my expression. My mind went back to the day of the fire, to being restrained. The last thing I wanted to do was hurt this man, or make him feel like I was judging him for any reason. That wasn’t it at all, and I tried like hell to tamp down my panic.
Unfortunately, he knew me too damn well. Crew noticed everything when it came to me, and he definitely didn’t miss the way my entire body went rigid.
The ropes fell to the ground, and he cursed creatively as he crossed the room and scooped me into his arms.
“I’m so sorry,” he breathed into my hair. “I didn’t even think.”
I shook my head. “It’s okay.”
“It’s not,” he said. “The last thing I ever want to do is hurt you.”
I smiled weakly as the way his words echoed my thoughts.
I pulled away far enough to look into his eyes. “Can’t you see, Crew? You’re not hurting me. Being in this town, beinghere, being with you—it’shealingme.”
And itwas, especially being at his side. I didn’t have nightmares anymore, not since I’d exclusively started sleeping in his bed, even on the nights when he was on shift. Being surrounded by his things, by his scent, soothed me and allowed me to rest fully for the first time in years. This house, this roommate situation…it had all started out as temporary. Then somehow, I blinked, and now it felt like a home, a life, and forever with Crew.
On an exhale, most of the tension in his shoulders dissipated,and he pressed a soft kiss to my mouth. “Still, I could’ve been more sensitive.”
“You took me by surprise,” I agreed.
“We don’t have to,” he said quickly, trying to shift me out of his hold so he could take the ropes back where he’d found them.
My hand darted out of its own accord, keeping him in place. My thoughts raced a thousand miles a minute as I tried to make sense of what I was feeling.
“I’m not scared,” I told him. “Not of you.Neverof you.”
“Okay…”
Maybe this was a chance to right some wrongs. I could think of no better person to guide me through that process than the man holding me, likeIwashislifeline despite the memories he’d unintentionally dragged up for me.
God, I loved him.
A sobering thought, and one that should’ve terrified me, but all I felt was peace. Safety, comfort, unwavering support, and yeah, his love too. There was no way he didn’t love me right back, not if he felt even afractionfor me what I did for him.
I gnawed on my bottom lip, downcasting my gaze. But Crew wouldn’t let me hide, and my head tipped up a moment later thanks to the rough pad of his pointer finger under my chin. “Say it.”
I mustered all the bravery I could. “I think I’d like it. To replace that memory of pain with one of pleasure.”
“Are you sure?”
I nodded. “I know you’ll take care of me.”
“Always. You are the most precious thing in my life.”
Then he let me go to retrieve the ropes.
Anticipation was a steady hum beneath my skin.
I was mesmerized by the way his hands moved as he unwound the lengths, how his forearms flexed, his tattoos on the left rippling like waves. The material didn’t appear to be rough orrigid; it looked soft, like it would gently caress my skin instead of biting into it.
Likely rope he’d purchased for exactly this purpose, and I couldn’t help but wonder how many other women he’d done this with.
So I asked.
