Page 44 of Note to Self
“Yeah, it is.”
The painting of Trent shocks me, but I have to admit it’s stunning. Trent is shuffling some papers on his desk, not looking at me.
“Babe, talk to me. What’s this about? Is it to do with the phone call?” It’s the only thing that can have caused this level of anxiety. Marc has said something that he isn’t telling me, something serious. “What else did Marc say to you? Because you’re not being you right now.”
He chews on the corner of his lip and frowns. His eyes reflect the inner turmoil going on.
“Are you in any danger?” It’s the only possible reason I can think of for his hesitancy.
The dry laugh is not what I expected, very un-Trent like. “Danger?” He snorts. “Marc may make threats, but he’s far too much of a coward to actually do anything. He’s saying he’ll find out where I am, but it’s nothing.”
“Then why this painting if it’s not him? Is it me? Have I done something wrong?” I gently lay my hand on his arm.
“It’s something I’ve had on my mind for some time now, and I’m finally coming to terms with being alone. I have no family anymore. I think it just hit me that I’ve lost my brother, that my parents will never speak to me again. I have you and Merrick, as well as all the other friends I’ve made, but there’sno blood relative on my side anymore.” He shrugs. “It’s stupid, I know. Don’t get me wrong. I’m happy, happier than I’ve been in a long time, but this has been building up in me since I got back. Maybe the picture is cathartic. Once it’s finished, I hope I can move on.”
“Will you put it in the exhibition? I can’t imagine anyone else wanting something so raw, so personal, on the wall of their living room.”
He laughs again, more genuinely this time. “Maybe, but it isn’t finished yet. There could be a hint of sunlight at the end of it. Anyway, enough of this doom and gloom. Go finish your digging, and I’ll get back to work. Please don’t find any more animals needing rescuing.” He leans into me, pressing his lips to mine.
I take hold of his hips and deepen the kiss, pouring my love into this moment. When we break apart, I look into his eyes. “You will never be alone or without me.”
It takes two more days for Trent to finish the painting, and he’s outdone himself. It’s stunning. He added a beam of sunlight through the clouds in the distance. It now looks like he’s facing the light rather than the despair of the wind and rain.
“What do you want to do with it?” Merrick runs his eyes over it, studying it as an expert rather than a friend. “It’s really bloody good, Trent. It will sell for sure, but maybe it’s too personal to you.”
“You can sell it. It’s done its job.” He points his finger at me. “Don’t buy it!” He tries to give me a stern look, but the humour in his eyes wins.
I chuckle. “Wouldn’t dream of it.” Thank god, he’s back to normal. “Is everything else there? Do we only need to get this one to the gallery?”
“I’m going to take it now. I want to get it situated in the right place, but I have to move a couple around for that. Everything will be ready for the weekend and the opening night. It’s very exciting, Trent. Josh would be so proud of you.”
“Thank you.” Trent smiles, then turns to me. “Shall we help Merrick and then go and see the cats?”
Jethro has kept us updated about the kittens. They are thriving, and after a few regular meals, the mum is now able to feed them herself.
Trent is eager to get them home, but I would rather the opening night to be over with first. Trent can devote all his time to them once the show is open.
We wrap the painting and place it in Merrick’s car. “Come to dinner tonight. Brodie and Ivan are coming too. Ivan’s mum is looking after Milo for the whole weekend,” Merrick says. “I thought they’d stay hidden away in their bedroom if they’re baby-free. But they said they’d enjoy the company. Something you’ll have to think of when it’s your turn.”
“Our turn, our turn to what?” I ask. What does Merrick mean? And why is Trent blushing?
Merrick grins. “Have children. I can see you both with a couple of kids.”
I have no idea what to say. I’ve never thought far enough ahead to having a family, but that’s because I hadn’t met Trent. Does he want them? One of the reasons he walked away from his parents was the constant nagging about him giving them grandchildren. That would be enough to put him off for life. “I don’t know. I’ve not thought about it. Have you?” I look at Trent. His cheeks are still pink.
“Um, I dunno. Maybe, one day.” He lowers his gaze, embarrassed at being put on the spot.
Merrick holds up his hands in an apologetic gesture. “Okay, I think I’ve said enough. I’ll see you at seven tonight.”
Trent lets out a long sigh. “He doesn’t mean to be nosy. He just wants everyone to be as happy as he is. I think after Josh died, he never thought he’d be happy and in love again.”
“It’s okay. I haven’t thought about having kids. Up until now, I’ve never been with someone I can see forever with. So yeah, maybe if it’s something you like the idea of too, we could think about it one day.”
“One day. I’m not ready to share you yet, except with the cats.” He kisses me. “Maybe we should go practice making babies.”
“I like that idea.” I lead him back into the house and up the stairs, giving his glorious arse a hard slap as we go.
“Hey.” He rubs his bum, but his grin gives him away. He’s in a playful mood, and as a reaction, my dick throbs in my jeans.
