Page 43 of Note to Self
“I can eat. Benny’s?”
“Yes. Soup and a grilled cheese sandwich.” My stomach gurgles again.
That Seagull is busy, but there’s an empty table on the side wall, and we head for it. It only takes a couple of minutesfor the server to arrive, and I give my order. Merlin chooses the same as me: tomato soup and a crispy, gooey, melted cheese grilled sandwich. My thoughts return to the cats and the state they were in.
“How long do you think they’d been there?”
Merlin understands what I’m talking about without any explanation. “Honestly, Trent, I’m too scared to think about it. We’ve found them, and they’re going to be safe now. Jethro is on it. He won’t let anything happen to them.”
“I’ve never had a pet,” I say. “My mother didn’t want them. Dirty creatures that will make a mess everywhere, leaving hair on the furniture. Unsanitary, she called them.” I roll my eyes. “Y’know, I can’t remember them ever laughing, having fun. It was always all about appearances and what others would think. That’s a really miserable existence, don’t you think? What are your family like?”
Merlin laughs. “Nothing like yours. My mother is a right mother hen, constantly looking to feed us, checking that we’re okay. My sister got it worse than me and Tom. Being the youngest and a girl and having two big brothers to look after her, she was spoilt. She’s grown up, though, and is travelling with her boyfriend. Australia, last time I heard.”
“I’d like to meet them.” I don’t know where that came from, but it seems like the right thing to say. Merlin’s face lights up.
“You would? That’s great. I’ve been wanting to ask my parents down to show them all I’ve achieved. I didn’t know if you’d be ready for that.”
The idea that he’s holding back from his family because of me makes me sad. I’ve let him down on the boyfriend front. “I’m sorry, Merlin. You should have said something. My fucked-up family is luckily no part of my life or my future. Ask them tocome down. You’ve done something here that deserves showing off.”
“Thanks, I’ll call them tonight. My mum will be thrilled. She’s desperate to meet you.”
“What? What have you said about me?” My cheeks heat up. No one has ever told their parents about me before.
“Only the truth. That you’re an amazing artist, so much smarter than me, and gorgeous.” He says it without mockery. He really means it.
“Thank you. It’s not how I see myself, but I’m learning.” Our lunch arrives and puts paid to any further conversations, while we tuck in.
The door opens, and Merrick and Drew, with Willow in his arms, come in. They wave hello and look for a table. Drew settles Willow in a chair, and Merrick walks over to us. “Hi, we don’t usually see you two in here at lunchtime.”
“We’ve had a bit of a morning.” I fill him in on what’s happened and that the cats are at the vets in quite a sorry state.
“How awful. Thank goodness you were there at the right time, Merlin. Are you keeping them?”
Merlin gives me a grin. “What do you reckon? Mister Softie here has called dibs on them. It will be a while before they can come home, though.”
“It will be good for the nursery too. You’ll have resident mousers, and they could even keep the rabbits off your plants,” Merrick says. “On another subject, the ads in all the magazines and newspapers have been sent and are getting a positive response. Opening night is fully booked, so with less than two weeks to go, are you ready, Trent?”
“Um, I kind of started a new painting today. Can you come over tomorrow and have a look?”
“Trent, we’ve decided on the whole plan and layout.” He sighs. “But okay, I’ll come over tomorrow. It will be around lunchtime. I’d better go before Willow shouts the house down.”
“A new painting? I didn’t know you were planning another one.” Merlin looks a bit put out, and rightly so. I always tell him when I start a new painting.
“It just sort of happened. Because of the things that went on earlier, y’know, with the phone call, I just wanted to lose myself for a while.”
“Is it my fault? Did I overstep?”
“No, no, not at all. I shouldn’t have answered it. At least it won’t happen again.” I take the last bite of my sandwich. “Shall we go?”
We pay and, with a wave to Merrick’s table, go back to Merlin’s Landie. Should I tell him that Marc threatened to find me, that I’ve made him look stupid because I disappeared and his friends have been asking about me? I don’t think it’s serious, only Marc overreacting and having a tantrum. It must be killing him to know they like me more than him.
“Can I see it?” Merlin asks tentatively when we walk back into the house.
“Of course.” I head for the stairs to the studio.
Merlin studies the half pencil, half watercolour of a man with his hands in the front pockets of his jeans, standing on the edge of the clifftop, the wind and rain whipping his hair around his face. Just staring out at the swirling, stormy sea as the waves crash and break on the rocks below.
“It’s you,” he says.
