Page 116 of Up In Flames
“Taylor doesn’t want you here. You’ve already said everything you needed to say,” Livvy points out.
“Please,” Patrick pleads. “I just want to clear the air.”
“Clear theair?How the fuck are you going toclear the airwhen you’re the reason my brother is lying here in pieces in the first place?”
Patrick closes his eyes, but the agony is clear on his face, which tells me Livvy’s words are true.
“Liv, what are you talking about?” I ask, my hackles rising.
“Taylor was on the phone with me when he got to his apartment. I was telling him to go toyou,Knox. He was so torn up about the way he left and how he treated you,” she pauses like she left something out when she told me this earlier. As it turns out, she did. “But he whispered Patrick’s name before telling me he’d call me later.” Turning back to Patrick, she says, “You werethere, weren’t you? At his apartment? What did you fucking say to him?”
Patrick turns a ghastly shade of white. He kind of looks like he might pass out, but none of us makes a move to help him. Sometimes, you have to learn life’s lessons the hard way.
“Say what you came to say, Patrick, and then you need to leave,” Taylor’s mom says, battle attitude on full display. “Considering what you told us?—"
“I lied,” he says, cutting Rebecca off before taking a step closer to Taylor’s bed, causing me to release Tay’s hand so I can stand and face Patrick head-on.
“Don’t eventhinkabout coming closer. You can confess your sins from there,” I tell him.
“Pat? What’s going on?” Bill asks.
“Taylor didn’t take advantage of me. Of course,he wouldn’t. Bird doesn’t have a manipulative bone in his body.” I bristle at the familiar use of Taylor’s familial nickname, but stay silent. “I was scared to admit what Taylor had become to me and I lied to protect myself and my relationship with Liam. But I ruined everything by making that choice. Somewhere along the way, I fell in love with Taylor while I grieved Emilia. Iambisexual, but Emilia never knew. She was my wife, so in my mind, my orientation didn’t matter because I couldn’t see anyone but her. There was never supposed tobeanyone but her. But then she was gone. And my grief isolated me, but Taylor…” He pauses to smile. “Taylor refused to let me drown. Despite the risks he knew were present.” Patrick pauses again to look at Damon. “He opened himself up to me. We had plans to tell everyone about our relationship, but when you boys found us,” he coughs, “hemhem, thewayyou found us, I got scared. I sacrificed Taylor to protect my relationship with you all—” he nods toward Bill and Rebecca, “and my relationship with Liam, and I willneverbe able to express how sorry I am for that. It was the biggestmistake of my life because after running into him again, I realized I’m not over him. I’m not sure I ever will be. I’m in love with Taylor and have been for a while.” Patrick sighs once he finishes like he’s just dropped a weight from his shoulders. But his relief is short-lived.
“You. Fucking.Asshole!” Livvy cries again, jumping from her chair to get in Patrick’s face. “You don’t haveany ideawhat my brother went through after that!”
“What our entirefamilywent through,” Damon adds, uncrossing his arms from his chest. “I haven’t spoken to my brother, mytwinbrother, inmonthsbecause I was so angry that he risked my friendship with Liam by taking advantage of you, only to find out you fuckingwanted it?” Damon strides over to Patrick in two steps and punches him right in the face. No hesitation, no warning. Although Damon is a couple of inches taller than Taylor, he’s still much smaller than me, but his punch was twice as hard as mine.
We all hear the crunch of bones snapping and aren’t sure if it’s Damon’s hand or Patrick’s nose.
At least we’re in a hospital.
“Don’t think this shitty fucking love confession means you’re forgiven, and if you think I’m going to keep this from Liam, you’ve got another thing coming,” Damon spits, moving to stand next to me, vibrating with anger.
Patrick tips his head back and reaches for a tissue from the box on the rolling hospital tray.
“We know you were hurting over the loss of Emilia, Pat,” Taylor’s dad says. “But how could you do that to our son? To us? How could you allow us,convinceus even,to believe that about him? We were in your corner. We took your word over his, and that caused a crack in our family’s foundation so wide we have yet to bridge the gap.”
“I’m so sorry,” is all Patrick manages as he stares at Taylor, unblinking. The longing in his eyes is hard to see because I know what that kind of grief can do to a person, and after losing his wife, I can’t imagine how he’s supposed to recover after losing Taylor as well.
Still doesn’t mean he’s getting another chance with my boyfriend, though. Or even getting close enough to try because I’m never letting Taylor go, and I will spend the rest of my life making sure he knows he’s loved and wanted and my main priority.
“It’s time for you to leave,” I tell the man responsible for breaking my beautiful boy.
“Please,” Patrick starts, looking around the room to anyone who might feel sympathy for him. “Can I at least say goodbye?”
“I think you’ve said enough,” Rebecca tells him.
“Oh, and Patrick,” I call. “If I catch you anywhere near Taylor again, I’ll have a restraining order filed so fast it’ll make your fucking eyes bleed.”
“Honestly,” he says sadly, his eyes drifting back to the love of my life as he continues to hold the tissues to his nose. “It’d be worth it just to hear his laugh one more time.”
Shortly after Patrick leaves, an increase in the beeping that has been a constant rhythm for days causes me to look down and see Taylor’s eyelids trying to flutter open.
Chapter 42
Taylor
“Lights,” is the first thing I manage to rasp. My throat is dry, but oddly, my lips don’t feel chapped.
