Page 150 of Test the Ice
His cologne burns my nose when he leans down to whisper in my ear, “But honestly, sweetheart, you jump into bed with a man you barely know, get engaged, and just expect I’ll be okay with him being my daughter’s stepfather? Do you even know him?”
Of course I do.
“What kind of mother are you to jump headfirst into a marriage this quickly?” His laugh is menacing, and I know he’s using insults as a weapon to put me into a nervous tizzy.
But it’s working.
I find myself hesitating…and doubting myself as a mother.
Is he right? Am I a terrible mother for jumping into things with Malaki so quickly? Of course, we’re not really engaged, but there is some truth to Benedict’s jab.
Am I being naive when it comes to Malaki?
Have I even thought of the consequences if this blows up in my face? Not only will I have to piece back together my crushed dreams, but I’ll have to mend a broken heart.
I’ll have to mend Charleigh’s broken heart too.
It’s not just me that I have to worry about.
“Are you rethinking things, sweetheart? Realizing that I have you by the throat?”
I know that if I give in to him, he really will have me by the throat, so I push past, my shoulder bumping into his, and say, “No.”
Despite Benedict’s false accusations, I walk into the courtroom with confidence.
I’ve always fended for myself, and today is no different.
I sit on the bench outside the courtroom with my hands underneath my thighs. What’s the point in being here by eight if there are multiple hearings before ours? Is it to make me second-guess every little thing? Because if so, it’s working.
My eyes burn from staring at my phone screen. I’ve learned all there is to know about custody cases and emergency motions from sitting here researching. My head is spinning by the end, and my nerves are no less fried than they were hours ago.
I close my eyes and press against the cool wall. Benedict has been huddled next to his lawyer on the other side of the hallway, the pair of them muttering back and forth to themselves like they have some grand plan to take me down.
The only good thing about his lawyer showing up is that he hasn’t said another word to me.
I hop to my feet on shaky legs when the door opens.
“Parties for Whitney vs. Moreno, Judge Ramirez is ready for you.”
My stomach turns.
Benedict and his lawyer stand up, neither one looking in my direction as they stride past. I run my sweaty palms over my dress and exhale a breath.
The bailiff gives me space but eyes me closely. After another breath, he says, “Are you ready?”
Am I ready?
No, I’m not fucking ready.
I nod anyway.
“Reese!”
Mid-step, I pause.
Malaki rushes toward me while tightening his tie.
“Malaki! What are you doing here?” I glance back and forth between him and the bailiff. His hand is on the door, waiting for me.
