Page 74 of Control Freak
“Ew,” Bailey said, nose crinkling up.
“Um, that’s actually what I wanted to talk to you all about,” I said hesitantly.
“You wanted to talk to us about sexing up Holden?” Axel teased.
I chuckled. “Not exactly.”
“What is it, Shy?” Holden asked.
I drew in a breath. “Well, I can’t tell you all how much I appreciate you letting me crash here and being so welcoming to a virtual stranger.”
“You’re Holden’s friend,” Bailey said. “That’s enough for us.”
I smiled at him. Bailey really was so sweet, and with his bone structure, ugh, he was going to drive someone absolutely crazy one day.
“We’re happy you’re here,” Holden said. “You getting a teaching job doesn’t change that.”
“Well, the thing is, substituting doesn’t pay great. I don’t know how soon I could get my own place. But if I continue camming, I could be out of here by next month.”
“Absolutely not,” Holden said.
The brothers exchanged looks.
“What Holden means to say,” Axel said firmly, “is that you’re welcome to stay longer, whether you quit camming or not. That’s your choice. Right, Holden?”
Holden paled. “Oh god, I wasn’t trying to be controlling.” At everyone’s skeptical expressions, he added, “Not this time! I swear.” He turned to me, his eyes imploring. “You said you couldn’t risk doing both, though. It’s how you lost your last job.”
I swallowed. “Yeah, it’s a risk. This substituting job is temporary, but it’s a step toward getting my life back on track.”
“If there was no risk, would you want to cam?” he asked quietly, eyes locked on mine. “If you could do anything you wanted, what would it be, Shy? Becausethat’swhat I want for you.”
“Even if…”
His lips twisted wryly. “I’m only human. I don’t love sharing you. At all.”
Axel’s cop boyfriend chuckled at the end of the table. “Points for honesty,” he rumbled.
“But…” Holden swallowed. “With everything you’ve done for me? I could never tell you to stop camming, not if it’s what you really want. I’ll learn to deal with it. Your happiness matters more than anything else.”
“Holden giving up control for someone?” Gray said. “That’s huge.”
It was. I didn’t take it lightly.
“I don’t want to keep camming. Risk or no risk. But I had to make sure you were all okay with me continuing to bum around your house.”
“We’re really suffering your presence.” Axel forked up a heaping portion of mac and cheese and stuffed it in his mouth. “Mm. It tastes like bribery.”
“It basically is,” I admitted. “I had to butter you all up.”
Everyone laughed. “You can butter me up with these biscuits every day,” Gray said, lifting one. “This is fucking gold.”
“My grandma’s recipe,” I said.
“You brought out the big guns,” Emory teased. “You must really want to stay.”
I hesitated. “I don’t want to overstay my welcome.”
“You could never do that,” Holden said.
