Page 21 of Grounded
I'm turning into a horny teenage boy, my innocent thoughts x-rated and unsavory. This is Theo, my stepmother’s son, I'm about to fantasize about.
He suspects nothing as my eyes focus on his golden brown hair which is a shade darker because he keeps brushing water through his strands. His eyes are so blue they are practically visible even at night.
The water is ribcage level, and I'm homed in on the veins snaking through his chest and arms. I'm so glad I can't see his abdomen, because I am a sucker for a six-pack, something Beckett was never able to acquire.
"You're staring," Theo announces.
Shit.
"I'm not staring, I'm spacing out." The lie sounds somewhat believable.
"I see you went to Roasted today, huh?"
"How do you know?"
"I saw your coffee cup in the trash when I threw mine away."
"Oh yeah. See, I'm capable of picking up after myself."
"It's a start."
He winks at me for a second time and I ask, "Do you have something in your eye?"
"Nope, it's funny to me you can't accept me being nice to you right now."
"Yes, I can!" Okay, maybe it's the wine talking, but that's a total lie. He's being civil, and no, I'm not used to that. "How was your coffee?"
"It was good—not as good as old times, though."
"Well, that's because you probably got a boring iced coffee instead of your usual large coffee shake with extra chocolate."
I immediately berate myself for bringing up this tidbit because it's opening the door to a conversation I don't want to have.
And yet, Theo steps right on through.
"Oh yes, how could I forget 'pudgy loser' written on my cup?"
I cringe. "I'm—I'm sorry."
We don't apologize, never have, but I feel the need to ask for forgiveness.
"It's okay, it was a million years ago," he says with a shrug.
The memory flashes through my mind like it was yesterday.
During the time our parents dated, Theo liked to come into Roasted with one of his closest friends. To antagonize me? Probably.
One day, I overheard their conversation, though I'm sure Theo was purposely keeping his voice loud. Seth–I think it was–commented on how hot I was. Theo said looks didn't matter with someone as stupid as I was. I didn't have the brains behind my pretty face, and there was no way a guy would stick around when he found out how dumb I was.
To get back at him, I wrote "pudgy loser" on his cup. And when his drink was ready, my coworker called it out and immediately recognized the harsh prank. The damage was done.
He attacked me for feeling inadequate and unintelligent. I saw how touchy he was with his looks and shined a light on it. We saw each other's most fragile insecurities and exploited them to retaliate.
We were cruel to each other, and there are a handful of other stories I'd rather not mention tonight, so I reiterate my apology.
"No, that was unacceptable, and I'm sorry."
"It's okay. I said some mean things about you also. Would you like an apology for when I called you a bitch?"
