Page 80 of Never Date A Player
“You said he called you his girlfriend. If he doesn’t settle down, why would he do that? Lewis doesn’t come across as insincere.”
I clench my teeth. I have no answer for that and I’m not ready to see reason, even if what she says makes sense. He could have called and told me he was having dinner with Mira—to support her, or whatever—but he didn’t. He left me on the outside, figuratively. Literally.
He’s a good guy, this person who’s there for his friends and who’s a hard worker. But in the end, what’s left for a relationship? What’s left for me?
Not enough.
Cali reaches out, but I need space. I shake my head and walk past her into the bedroom—to find my mom asleep in my bed.
I curse under my breath. I’m having a crisis, so of course my mother is here to add to the burden.
After changing quietly, I ease under the covers, trying to get my breathing to calm and my mind to stop spinning. Tears sneak out and I squeeze my eyes shut.
Lewis cares for me, I know he does, but it hurts to be left on the outside. I don’t want to feel guilty or wrong for wanting more than he seems willing to give. Yet I love him and I don’t want to let him go.
It’s all so complicated.
My mother touches my arm. She scoots closer and I quickly wipe my face. “What happened?” she asks in a voice more awake than I expected.
“Nothing.”
“Gen, don’t shut me out because I made a mistake. It was a large one, granted, but I’m always here for you. I’m in this lumpy, cramped bed with godawful sheets. If that’s not a testament to love, I don’t know what is.”
I chuckle. She’s right. For her, this is roughing it. “I picked the wrong guy. Again.”
“You care for him?”
I don’t answer. I can’t. I’m working too hard at ignoring the pain in my abdomen.
My mother sighs and curls around me. I fall asleep like that, embraced by her. It’s the first time in a very long time she’s given me unsolicited, nonjudgmental comfort—and I need it.
A sound disrupts my sleep. It takes me a minute to figure out where I am. I glance at my mom lying next to me. She makes a mewing sound and rolls in her sleep, taking the covers with her. It must have been her snoring that woke me.
I close my eyes and turn on my side, but the sound comes again. A tapping—not my mother. From the window?
What the hell?
I crawl out of bed and pull aside the drape. Lewis is standing outside the window.
He points to the front door and I nod.
I grab a sweatshirt and quietly exit the room. The house is dead silent. I have no idea what time it is, but it must be after one in the morning because no one’s awake, not even Tyler, and he stays up late.
I unbolt the lock and open the door. Lewis is leaning against the porch post, his gaze on me. My stomach flutters.
This reaction to him has always been a nuisance, and now is no different. “Hey.”
He angles closer. “What happened earlier?”
I wrap my arms around my waist. “We haven’t seen each other in several days. I went to check on you. I got your address from Nessa because you never told me where you live.”
He actually appears confused by this. “I guess we’ve been busy… and I like coming here.”
I look around. “You prefer my ten-by-ten shack the nineteen-seventies threw up on to your centerfold cabin in the woods?”
He shrugs. “You’re here. I don’t notice much else. We’ll go to my place, I just—” He steps forward and I inch back. His brow furrows. “Gen, what’s going on? You seem upset. Earlier—why did you leave without coming inside?”
Obviously, I made a racket tripping over the patio furniture. “And ruin your moment?”
