Page 99 of Inevitable
“Can you really do that after what happened?” Colin asked.
“Yes.”
“Why?”
“Because I know it’s relatively safe,” I said calmly. “I was scared, too, but it’s not the first time my daughter has worried me over the years. Every illness and injury she’s had scared me, but you kind of get used to worrying about your child. You learn to protect them as much as you can, but you know you can’t prevent everything that happens. You’d have to put your kid in a bubble for that, and that’s not good for their development.”
“Why does it have to be scuba diving?” Colin said in a disgruntled tone.
“It’s the only thing she’s ever begged me to do. It’s the only sport she’s ever been interested in. She wants to be a marine biologist with an advanced degree so she can do research. If she’s going to be diving for a living in the future, I’d rather she have as much exposure and as much experience as possible from the beginning.”
“Fuck!” he cursed. “I guess that’s true.”
“She grew up here, Colin,” I said reasonably. “She’s been in Lake Michigan since she was old enough to play in the shallows. She’d like to experience some ocean diving. She’ll need you to guide her for that. Wren will be fifteen in two years, and she’ll be able to dive independently.”
“Not happening,” he said stoically. “I’ll be there for every single dive as long as she’s underage.”
I nodded. “I don’t think I’d be able to let her go without parental supervision even when she meets the age requirements. She’s always going to need a dive buddy, and I’d prefer that it’s one of her parents until she’s an adult.”
I should probably remind him that he wasn’t always going to be here when Wren wanted to dive, but I didn’t.
He’d probably had enough parental trauma for one day.
I knew Colin would eventually see sense once he got over all of that initial fear of seeing his daughter in a bad situation.
I’d been exactly where he was right now many times in the past.
“How in the hell did you manage to live through the first thirteen years of her life?” Colin asked unhappily.
“It was hard when she was a baby and a toddler,” I confessed. “I worried about everything. But I had to eventually send her to school. Letting go is always hard.”
“I was pretty harsh with her today, Emma,” he shared. “Nothing that happened was her fault. I let my fear get the better of me. I’ve never done that before.”
“Get used to it,” I teased. “Wren just lets it roll off her back because she understands that our fear is a product of love. Did she seem upset to you when she went to bed?”
“No,” Colin mused. “But she had a right to be upset. I know I can’t just stroll into her life and tell her what to do. But it’s damn hard to fight the urge to protect her.”
I knew he was struggling, and I hated that for him.
He was fighting the fatherly instinct to protect his daughter while trying not to come on too strong with Wren because he hadn’t been around for her during the last thirteen years.
“I don’t really need to tell her what to do anymore, Colin. She has a good head on her shoulders. She does all of her chores without me needing to remind her. For the most part, I let her reason things out herself because she’s capable of doing it. She just needs some guidance sometimes. You’ll figure that out after she’s been in your life for a while.”
“I hope so,” he grumbled. “Right now I’d like to put her in that bubble and make sure that she never gets hurt.”
I smiled. “You know that’s not realistic. We learn from our mistakes and getting hurt once in a while.”
“Yeah, well, it seems that my rational mind has fled my body since I met my daughter,” he rumbled.
“I wish I could tell you that it gets easier,” I told him. “It really doesn’t, but you’ll learn to tolerate those emotions a lot better because you want what’s best for your child.”
“I’ll talk to her tomorrow,” he promised. “I know I can’t keep her from something she loves because of my own irrational fears. I overreacted.”
“I know,” I said softly. “Been there and done it myself more times than I can count.”
“Have I told you what an incredible woman you are, Em?” he asked huskily.
I laughed. “Because I freak out over my daughter sometimes?”
