Page 54 of Mason Wilder
“Look at this!” Sindy exclaimed, picking up the magazine on the coffee table with her photo on the cover. “Your parents have the new issue ofGuitar World. I didn’t even know it was out yet. My first magazine cover!”
Tension and worry dissipated as Tessa took the magazine from her best friend. “You look awesome.” They huddled together on the sofa and turned the pages of the magazine. There were photos of Sindy on stage and stills from a private photo shoot sprinkled throughout the article. As they skimmed the pages, Damien walked into the room.
He jutted his chin toward them in greeting. “S’up?” He stopped in front of Sindy and pointed to the magazine. “That’s cool.”
“Thank you.” Sindy turned to Tessa and looked as if she was about to explode at the understated compliment, which made Tessa laugh.
Damien squatted in front of the magazine rack and rifled through it. He found the magazine he had been searching for – an issue ofBass Player Magazinewith Lemmy on the cover – and stood up ready to exit the room.
He headed for the doorway and then suddenly stopped. After a second, he turned around and took two steps toward Tessa. “I don’t stick my nose in people’s business, but when I got shit to say, I say it. And I got shit to say.”
Sindy immediately sat back, intimidated by Damien’s brutal honesty, but Tessa was confused. “About what?” Tessa asked.
“Kendall.”
Tessa’s heart sank. She didn’t want to hear any negative comments about Kendall. She wanted Mason to bond with his birth mother, free from the gossip circulating in the family. She hated drama. But then she realized something. No one gave specifics. Everyone tiptoed around the reason they had a problem with Kendall. Damien wouldn’t hold back. He’d give her the unfiltered truth. She wasn’t sure if she wanted to hear it, though. The past was the past for a reason. While she was still figuring out if she should tell Damien not to divulge any family secrets or not, he started talking.
“She’s been on the top of everyone’s shit list for as long as I can remember.”
“Everyone’s?” Tessa asked, skeptically
“Pretty much. She’s crossed a lot of people. Including me.”
While Tessa exchanged an uneasy glance with Sindy, Damien bowed his head causing his big blue Mohawk to dip forward. His gruff features turned sorrowful. Remorseful. Vulnerable. It concerned Tessa. This man had built so many walls between his emotions and the world, but, somehow, Kendall had broken through them.
“You know I had a drug problem, right?”he said after a long pause.
Tessa nodded. He wasn’t embarrassed about it. It was part of his history. It was common knowledge and he spoke of it freely. But the look on his face right now was one of shame.
“I slipped up once,” Damien admitted. “I was young. Newly sober. I fell off the wagon one night and had a few drinks. No pills. Just a couple of glasses of whisky. She was there. She saw it. But Alyssa didn’t know. My girl was helping her mom with an art show in Montreal for a couple of days. It was just a momentary slip up. I regretted it, and I got to a meeting. Swore I’d never do it again. I figured Alyssa would never find out about it, right?”
Tessa shook her head. She knew right away what Kendall did. “She ratted on you.”
“No. I wouldn’t let my girl find out from that bitch. I told her myself. Confessed my sins and begged for penance.”
“What happened?” Tessa asked, cautiously, knowing full well that Alyssa didn’t put up with an ounce of crap from anyone.
“She walked out on me. Left for a couple of days.” Despair and darkness covered Damien’s face, and his eyes read pain and loss. “My heart broke. It was the way she looked at me that killed me. Like I disappointed her. Like I threw everything that we had in the can. Like she didn’t matter to me.” He slowly shook his head, causing the macabre tattoos that covered his neck to move as if they came to life.“I honestly thought I was going to die of a broken heart. But she forgave me and came back. I haven’t touched a drop of alcohol since then.”
Tessa’s heart ached for him. Damien, who had always been so strong, so rock solid, stood here a deflated man. She wanted to wrap her arms around him and tell him everything was OK now. That he beat his addiction and that she looked up to him. But she knew he was guarded and didn’t like physical affection. Still, she couldn’t watch his pain and do nothing, so she stood up and placed a soothing hand on his arm. “Alyssa loves you. No matter what. We all love you, Damien.”
He gave her a questioning look, and the corner of his mouth slowly drew back into a smile. “You comforting me?”
“Of course. You’re hurting and I feel so bad.”
He shrugged. “It’s cool. I’ve been through a ton of shit, but it made me tougher.”
He could put up all the barricades he wanted, she knew that it was all a cover so people wouldn’t see his sensitivity. She remembered when he taught her how to play the bass. She’d been a kid and initially overconfident. Singing came naturally for her, and she had thought learning an instrument would be just as easy. But it was work. She had needed to practice and sometimes pushed herself, but still messed up. She had been hard on herself, expecting to be further along at times. He’d never lost patience and always showed understanding. He explained that it took time to master an instrument. It didn’t matter how many times he needed to show her a chord or remind her what it looked like on paper, he meticulously went over it until she knew it backwards and forwards. That’s when she had realized that there were two sides to this man she regarded as an uncle. “You’re not so tough.”
He scowled and nudged her in the shoulder with his knuckle. “Am too.”
“I don’t understand,” Sindy interrupted, getting up from the couch and joining them. “What would Kendall gain by telling Alyssa you fell off the wagon? Was she just trying to be mean?”
Damien wiped a tattooed hand over his face, sweeping away the playfulness that was there a minute ago. A deep crease permeated his brow, and he glanced toward the doorway. He stepped closer and lowered his voice to a whisper. “I’ve never told anyone this. Except Angel. I probably shouldn’t be telling you right now, but you asked, and you should know her M.O. How low and vindictive Kendall can be.” He paused to look toward the doorway again. “Kendall wanted me to sleep with her in order to keep quiet.” His scowl deepened. “As if I’d ever look at anyone ‘cept my girl. Fuck Kendall. She’s always trying to start shit in people’s lives. I don’t like her, and I don’t trust her. I ain’t got no kids. You’re it. You and Lucas and Mason.” He eyeballed Sindy and jutted his chin at her. “You, too. Kendall better not fuck with you,” he told Tessa. “Watch out for her. She has an ulterior motive for everything she does. I know Mason says she’s changed, but I’m not fallin’ for it.” He shrugged, dismissing the hostility that punctuated his words a moment ago. “That’s it. That’s all I wanted to say.” With the conclusion of his story, he rolled up the magazine in his hand. “I just came in here to grab something to read while I take a shit and I ended up spilling my guts. Man, you girls really know how to grill a dude.” And then he left.
Tessa’s mouth hung open with disbelief at Damien’s admission. She wanted to say something, but didn’t think there was anything to say to that, except, “Oh my God.”
“It was a long time ago,” Sindy tried to reassure her. “Maybe she really did change. You have to believe she did. For Mason.”
