Page 56 of Don't Hate Me
“It would be helpful if you didn’t look like you were marching to your death while walking down the aisle.”
Except that was exactly what I was doing. I was headed toward my inevitable death. I knew it, even if he didn’t.
“I’ll smile,” I assured him.
He looked like he wanted to say more, threaten more, but really, there was no point. He was getting the wife he wanted. Marc was in jail, or at least would be in a few hours. He was surrendering himself today at Fort Dix. The timing wasn’t lost on either of us.
George and his attorney were with him. I’d written him a letter that George would give to him. The thought of it, of him reading it in jail, broke my heart.
Tomorrow, George was resigning his position. Arthur would be furious, no doubt, but George would make it clear he’d only stuck around as long as he had, so he could watch over me.
If I wasn’t on the estate, there was no point for him to be. He planned to rent an apartment for the next year so he could stay close to Marc. Then, once Marc was free, George would retire to North Carolina. He’d said I could leave Evan and join him there, which was sweet, but not nearly thorough enough.
No, leaving Evan had to be final.
Another knock on the door, and, this time, Arthur popped his head in. “They’re ready for you, Evan.”
“I’ll see you in a few minutes, my dear. Remember, smile.”
I flashed my fakest smile and it seemed to appease him. He left, then it was just me and Arthur. From a few feet away, I could already smell the booze on him. I wondered vaguely if I was the reason he’d started drinking. If some semblance of guilt had driven him to it. It didn’t matter.
“You look lovely—”
“Stop,” I ordered him. “This isn’t a happy day. You are not my father. You’re the man selling me into slavery with that horrible person. There’s no point in small talk. Are we understood?”
He grimaced, but said nothing. I picked up my bouquet, forced my arm through his, and said. “Let’s get this over with.”
“You’ll never want for anything. Evan’s money, it’s endless.”
I turned my head toward the man who used to say that everything he did was for my protection.
“I want you to know the only good thing about this day is I’ll never have to see you again. So, when you see pictures of me smiling, know I was thinking about that.”
Then I bent over and spat on his shoes.
Another grimace, but he didn’t say a word after that. Not when he handed me over to Evan. Not when we had the traditional father-daughter dance at the reception. Not when Evan drove us away to his home in Harborview after the guests had started to depart.
I went to the bedroom Evan had declared was mine. As he’d told me previously, he had no interest in me sexually, so I wasn’t concerned about him trying to follow me. Still, I locked the door and laid on the bed looking up at the ceiling, wondering if Marc felt exactly like I did in that moment.
Nearly hopeless.
Nearly.
16
Fort Dix
Two weeks after the wedding
Marc
“I toldGeorge to tell you that you didn’t have to come.”
Ash tilted her head like what I’d said confused her.
“Of course, I have to be here. I have to see you. Every other week. That’s my deal.”
“That’s your deal with Evan. Not with me. I don’t like you seeing me in here. In this fucking orange jumpsuit. It shames me. Can you understand that?”
