Page 59 of Love By the Book
I force a smile, but my throat is tight. What I don’t say is:But that’s the difference, isn’t it?Alex saw Ethan’s messy secrets—his fear, his shifting, all of it—and loved him anyway. I showed Jacob mine… and he let me go.
Some people are meant to be loved. I mean, look at Ethan. He’s got those twinkly blue eyes and makes cookies that tastelike a Hallmark movie. He’s completely sincere when he offers to judge the kids pumpkin painting contest at the Harvest Hoopla even if he has to do it at Dean Markham’s side.
That’s not me.
I talk too fast when I’m nervous. I feel too much, say the wrong thing, get big ideas I can’t always pull off. I’m glitter and chaos and half-baked plans.
No one stays for that.
“It doesn’t matter,” I say. “Some stories don’t get happy endings. Some people aren’t meant for love that lasts.”
“I don’t believe that,” Alex says softly. “And honestly? I don’t think you do either. What about the way you swoon over every romance at book club? Or how seriously you took this matchmaking idea? Rhianna you’re a person wholoveslove. You pour it into everyone else. You deserve to have it too.”
I set down my mug with a decisive clink. “What I know is that I’ve seen this movie before. I know how it ends.”
My mind drifts to Jacob’s expression the night my grandmother died—how his expression shifted from sympathy to discomfort as the days passed and I couldn’t pull myself together. How he started making excuses not to come over.
“You know what Jacob said to me when he finally worked up the courage to end things?” I ask, my voice barely above a whisper. “He said he needed someone more stable. That I was too much, felt things too intensely.” I swipe at a tear. “Alex, he was right.”
“No, he wasn’t,” she says too loudly. A couple at the table behind us turns to look. She takes a breath, lowers her voice, but her tone stays razor-sharp. “Eli isn’t Jacob, Rhianna. I’ve seen how he looks at you, like you hung every star in the sky. That’s not a man who’s going to walk away when things get difficult.”
For one dangerous moment, I let myself imagineit—a future with Eli. Mornings spent in quiet conversation. Evenings filled with laughter. A life where I don’t have to hide the messy parts of myself. Where I’m loved not in spite of being too much, but because of it.
But hope is a treacherous thing. He’s already making plans to leave Magnolia Cove. And so am I. This story always ends the same, no matter how much I hope it might turn out differently.
“I appreciate what you’re trying to do.” I press my hands together in my lap. “But not everyone gets a fairy tale, Alex. Some of us are just… too much. And that’s okay.” I force a smile that doesn’t reach my eyes. “I’m fine with being the matchmaker, not the match.”
Alex opens her mouth like she wants to argue, but something in my expression must stop her. She presses her lips together before she speaks. “Okay,” she says slowly. “Then can I ask you something?”
I nod, wary.
“If someonewereto fight for you… like really show up, no matter how messy things got—would you let them in?”
“In that romance-book scenario, which will of course never happen in real life, then, yeah, I’d like to think I’d at least try to let them in.” I attempt to sound dismissive but there’s a wistfulness I can’t quite hide. “But that kind of thing doesn't happen in real life.”
Alex tilts her head, studying me with an intensity that makes me squirm. There’s a calculating look in her eyes I’ve seen before—the same one she gets when she’s troubleshooting a recipe or planning a menu overhaul.
“What?” I ask suddenly, wary.
“Nothing.” She smiles too innocently and leans back against her black metal chair. “Just thinking.”
“Alex…” I narrow my eyes. “Whatever you’re plotting, stop it. This isn’t one of our romance book picks. There’s no grand gesture that can change anything.”
“I didn’t say a word about grand gestures.”
I grab my notebook and brush tears from my cheeks. “You didn’t have to. That look says everything.”
Alex raises her hands in surrender, but there’s still that gleam in her eye. “I promise I won’t interfere withyour decisionsabout your love life.”
Something about her wording makes me squint. “That’s a very specific promise.”
I narrow my eyes, but I’m too emotionally wrung out to press further. “Good. Thanks for the intervention with Iris and the shoulder to cry on. I’ll Venmo you for the gift card you gave her.” I sling my bag over my shoulder with a sigh. “Now I’m going to go be a mature, responsible adult and cry into a carton of ice cream in my bedroom in private.”
Alex snorts. “I suggest the lavender honey one from Sweet Harmony. You deserve premium breakdown fuel.”
I roll my eyes, but a laugh slips out anyway.
She reaches for the empty mugs. “Go easy on yourself, Rhi. Just becauseyouthink your story’s over doesn’t mean the universe agrees.”
