Page 82 of Ours
“Derek.” Carl steadied his gaze at the boy on the other end of the couch. “When you decided to go forward with that littleplan of yours, you made every possible bad decision along the way. You lied to, manipulated, andusedone of your best friends because the thought of it made your dick hard.
“That boy has had his entire life turned upside down. You went from best friend, and by your own admission,protector,to his dom and ownerin a single night. You even took away his choice to come out of the closet to you.” Carl sat back on the couch. “And Derek, I remember high school. You and I both know there’s no way Cory was the first virgin you’ve been with. Youknowwhat that can do to a person’s emotions. You leave that boy alone and count yourself lucky that that’s the end of it.”
Derek was silent as he let Carl’s words sink in. Carl was right. This was just Derek’s incessant need to be a control freak coming up again. Still, Derek wasn’tonlyconcerned with Cory… “What about Nic?”
“You leave him be too. Sounds like that boy is dealing with some things about himself that he’s not ready to admit,” Carl said somewhat thoughtfully. “Not saying he’s any less guilty of doing the same things to Cory, but I’m willing to bet that until he can come to terms with his own sexuality, the rest of this would just be lost on him.”
Derek was again silent for a few minutes, mind blank. He felt numb. “I… I don’t know what to do without those two. They’ve been my friends forever.”
“You’ll be okay.” Carl slid over on the couch and patted Derek on the leg. “I know it seems like the end of the world right now, but you’ll heal, I promise. Come on. I’m starving. Let’s order a pizza.”
Carl stood and walked toward the kitchen, not waiting to see if Derek was following. The sudden subject change caught Derek off guard … but pizzadidsound pretty good right now.
Carl smiled when he saw Derek entering the kitchen. Nothing to soothe a broken teenage heart like some pizza. He pulled themenu for his favorite local place and asked Derek about toppings and phoned in the order. They had about a half hour to kill until it got there.
“Thanks for talking to me about all of this.” Derek pulled out one of the bar stools from the kitchen counter. “And for not … thinking I’m a monster.”
“Not a monster.” Carl chuckled as he returned the pizza menu to the side of the fridge. “An idiot, maybe, but one I hope will use this to learn from his mistakes in the future.”
“I will. Ireallywill.” Derek was being stoic. “I just never thought about what it would be like to lose my two best friends. I didn’t expect it to hurt like this.”
Carl snorted before he realized Derek was being serious. “You still think this isjustabout losing your two best friends, kid?”
“What do you mean?”
“Boy, you spent nearly every day for three or four months with these two. And you spent nearlyallof that time together in close, intimate quarters, having what I can only assume was some of the most intense sex of your life. You took your best friend’s virginity. You put a damn collar around his neck.” Carl was really going to have to spell it out. Poor kid. “I think those two stopped beingjustyour friends a while ago. You’re heartbroken, Derek.”
“Oh.” Derek stared at the granite countertop, somewhat dumbfounded.
“Yeah, ‘oh.’” Carl laughed again.
“I never really…” Derek trailed off. He hadn’t ever thought of his relationship with Nic or Cory that way. Hadn’t thought of it as a relationship at all. It wasn’t like when he had girlfriends… Was it? He did miss them, a lot. Missed hanging out with them. Hated seeing Cory with someone else. And he felt like an asshole, but he’d be lying if he said he didn’treallymiss the sex, too. “Huh.”
“You learn something new every day, kid.” Carl opened his fridge and grabbed two cans—only soda, of course. He had a feeling they still had a lot more to talk about before the night was over. “Alright, so now why don’t you tell me what exactly is going on with your parents that you can get away with even half of this shit?”
Derek groaned. The pizza could not get here fast enough.
“Shit. That does suck.” Carl wiped the pizza grease from his beard with a napkin.
“They weren’t always like this. They were great when I was younger.” Derek took a swig of his soda. “Once my big brother moved out, I think they both just figured I’d be gone soon enough. What’s another year or two of raising your youngest son?”
“Anyone ever tell you that you’re kind of a spoiled brat?” Carl chuckled.
Derek almost choked on his pizza trying to defend himself, making Carl laugh harder.
“Calm down. I’m only fucking with ya. A little.” Carl waited for Derek to swallow his mouthful before continuing. “I’m not saying your parents didn’t drop the ball. It sounds like they got a little too preoccupied with work to think about how that felt to you… But sixteen or seventeen years of being attentive loving parents ain’t nothing. And if theyweren’tgone, you wouldn’t have done or learned half the stuff you have these past few months. You’re kinda acting like—”
“—The world revolves around me and my problems?”
“So youhavebeen called a spoiled brat before.” Carl grinned to show he was still just joking.
“Maybe not in those exact words.” Derek thought back to what Tricia had said to him at school. Maybe he should just crawl into a hole somewhere…
“Hey, none of that,” Carl half-ordered, trying to stop Derek from overthinking things too much. “You fucked up, and you learned. You can only try to do better going forward. Beating yourself up isn’t going to make anybody feel better, least of all yourself.”
“Yes, sir.” Carl was right. Derek tried to shake the thoughts from his head rather than let himself be pulled down. “Thanks again for listening to everything.”
“Of course, kid.” Carl let the “sir” Derek slipped in pass without comment. “Not sure why, but ever since the three of you walked into the store that day, I’ve felt a little protective of ya. When you started asking me for advice, I was more than happy to provide. I just wish I had known a little more about what was going on sooner. Might have been able to save you some hurt.”
