Page 130 of Stay With Me
“Mine is the size of a poppy seed.” She shows me the photo. “Hm, Poppy. That’s a cute name.”
I shoot her a look of concern. “Sorry, but I’m not namin’ mine Lentil.” If that’s where she’s going with it, I’d choose Chatty or Willow first.
At the thought of Tripp’s baby name idea, tears threaten to fall again.
Noah bursts out laughing. “Fair enough.”
Per the app, I’m six weeks along, which means we’re only two weeks apart and we’ll go through a lot of our milestones together.
“I’m excited to go through my first pregnancy with you. Even if the circumstances aren’t what you’d hoped for, you’re gonna be a mom, and that’s somethin’ to celebrate,” she says as I stare at the screen.
I nod. “You’re right.”
At the end of the day, regardless of the shitty situation I got myself in, a new life will be born in nine months and I’ll be responsible for them. A baby that’ll change my life forever.
“We’ll plan a dinner and sleepover at my house this weekend. Whaddya say? I’m sure Mallory and Serena would love to come to a dance party.
I actually love that idea. We’ve been doing them for years, and when the girls came into our lives, we recruited them to join us. Even in our twenties, we act like we’re back in high school again and have the time of our lives.
“Can you still have slumber parties when you’re married?” Itease, and when the tears I try holding back fall, I quickly wipe them.
“Um, duh. Fisher knows who he married. If he wasn’t prepared for Taylor Swift sing-alongs and pajama nights, he shouldn’t have proposed.”
I’m so envious of their relationship but am so happy she has him. She deserves a great guy like him. That’s the future I envisioned with Tripp, but now, that might be gone.
“You’re so lucky to have each other. You won the husband lottery,” I say.
“And you will find someone equally lucky to have you. I promise.”
I already have...but he might not want me after he finds out the truth.
We chat for a few more minutes as she drinks her coffee. When a customer approaches, we hug goodbye and make plans to see each other on Thanksgiving in a couple of days.
For the next two hours, I have a steady line of people, so I don’t have time to overthink, but as soon as three hits and I close up for the day, my brain spirals out of control again.
Maybe I should only focus on my business and pregnancy.
Maybe being in a relationship right now isn’t the best idea.
MaybeI should let him go so he can be happy with someone else.
Tripp doesn’t deserve the shitstorm I’m about to lay on him. Especially once Travis knows, he’s going to be insufferable about us getting back together.
No matter what he says, promises, or does—that’ll never happen. I’m stronger and have more self-respect for myself than when I was in high school. Plus, it’s not only me I have to think about now. Another human is going to depend on me for everything and that alone is scary. How am I supposed to juggle dating into the mix?
I can’t even fathom being with someone who’s having a kid with someone else, so I can’t expect that kind of understanding from Tripp. As much as I’ve wanted him for years and have beeninsanely happy these past few weeks, my life’s about to flip upside down.
And that’s not fair to him.
By the time I get home, I’ve made my decision.
Our now perfect little bubble is about to burst because I’m about to destroy everything we made.
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Tripp
November 26thcan go fuck itself.
