Page 88 of Once Upon a Crown
“Tell me if this is mediocre.”
And then his lips were on mine.
Lance kissed me slowly but with certainty. Like he meant it. Like he’d been thinking about doing it for some time now.I didn’t pull back, even though I knew I should. Nothing good could come from kissing the Prince of Everness. And yet...
I savoured the feeling of his mouth moving against mine. It was like the first drop of rain after an endless drought. Something I didn’t realise I craved until I had a taste. And now I wanted more.
Lance’s hand cupped my jaw, tilting my head so that he could kiss me even harder. The world around us disappeared, and there was only me and Lance in the library and the scent of him, which reminded me of Norrandale on an icy winter morning combined with something minty.
I placed my hand on his wrist, and he hesitated for a moment as if he thought I was going to pull away from him, but on the contrary, I wanted him closer. Yet I was out of my mind with fear. Was this only happening because we were trying to distract ourselves from our grief? Were we placeholders until something better came along to fill the void? I didn’t want to consider it.
The kiss grew more urgent, as if neither of us could afford to take our time anymore. The string between us had been pulled taut until it finally snapped, and I feared I might drown in this moment and in him.
Lance breathed something that sounded like my name when thunder suddenly rumbled outside. The noise was loud enough that the windows rattled, and it caused us both to jump.
I tried to catch my breath while my mind slipped back to reality.
“I really hate the thunder,” I muttered, brushing my hair away from my face. My cheeks were flushed, and I felt both hot and freezing all over my body.
“Come on.” Lance stood up, looking a little dazed himself. “I’ll help you to your rooms.” He pulled me into a standing position.
This was a bad idea. As much as I’d enjoyed kissing Lance, I knew it couldn’t happen again. I didn’t want to be another one of Lance’s games. Both of us had too many things that we needed to deal with. And most of all, I didn’t want to give him the opportunity to break my heart.
Chapter 35
Elara
“I don’t know what to do.”
I paced up and down my rooms, rubbing my hands together to keep my fingers from freezing.
“What do you mean, Your Majesty?” Anesta was sitting in a chair close to the fire. I’d invited her to join me for dinner, hoping that her company would bring me ease. I had picked at my plate for a few minutes while Anesta ate but grew too sick to my stomach to finish the meal. Not after everything that had happened today.
“I’m talking about Cai and how he is being completely irrational and paranoid.”
Each footstep sounded loudly on the hardwood floors, and I realised I had yet to change out of my dirtied clothes and boots. I was deep in thought when I returned to my rooms, mentally going over my conversation with Cai. Wondering how everything between us had gone so wrong so quickly. He’d wanted me to give back the Myrgonite dagger, not trusting me to keep it safe.
The woollen vest was no longer doing enough to keep me warm despite the fire, and my muddy boots were leaving traces of dirt everywhere.
“I see, Your Majesty,” Anesta said diplomatically.
I kicked off my boots and started looking through my trunk of clothes for something clean to wear. Our trunks had arrived a few hours ago, the palace quickly settling back into its previous state. With the exception of all the court members being replaced by soldiers, of course.
“I have been Queen of Everness longer than he has been King of Norrandale, if you want to be technical about it, and hestill treats me like I’m an infant who knows nothing and is likely to cause our doom because of it.”
As I said the words out loud, I realised what was behind my frustration. After everything we’d been through, it felt as though Cai had no faith in me. Not as a ruler and not even as a betrothed. I wanted to understand his reasoning, to see his perspective, but I could not comprehend this irrational behaviour of his.
I scrubbed at my face and neck, removing any trace of dirt or blood, as if I could wash away the day’s events along with it.
“Maybe His Majesty is only having a bad reaction after everything that has happened today. It might have brought back a lot of bad memories for him.”
“That doesn’t excuse his behaviour.” I wished I could tell her about the dagger and how Cai had insisted I give it back to him. But it was better to keep Anesta out of it as much as possible. If Cai was right about one thing, it was that the more people knew about the Myrgonite objects, the more dangerous it was for all of us.
“Then again, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to unsee it. To forget what he did to Thatcher.” I dropped onto the bed, my body aching all over. I desperately needed a good night’s rest.
“I heard it was pretty bad.”
“Thatcher deserved it. I know he did.” I reconsidered Anesta’s words and my conversation with Cai. Maybe I was overreacting. Maybe we both were. And even if I was a little upset with him, I still worried about him.
