Page 76 of Once Upon a Crown
Of course, he couldn’t remember.
“When you and your father last visited Norrandale. That night at the party when you found me spying on the guests.”
“I—” He hesitated. “That was? You mean to tell me you hadn’t kissed anyone before that?”
“I was sixteen,” I reminded him. “And I wasn’t out in society. And I’d like to think myself a lady who doesn’t just go around kissing random boys.”
“So, you—” Lance pressed his fingers to the bridge of his nose as if still trying to process the information. “You’re angry with me because I kissed you once, a very long time ago?”
“Yes,” I huffed. “Well, no.” I groaned in frustration, unable to believe that I was actually having this conversation with him.
“I’m angry because you made me believe that you cared for me in some way, showing me how to dance and following me around the palace all the damned time. And then you had the audacity to kiss me without a chaperone around and leave without a word. My reputation could have been ruined, and I never heard from you again.”
Saying it out loud felt a little ridiculous. Of course, my mother would have had a fit if she’d known I was kissing boys while hiding away from parties, but as no one was likely todiscover us up there and I would never breathe a word of my encounters with Lance, it was unlikely my reputation would have suffered from the matter. And yet somehow, against my will, my heart did. I was hurt by him in a way I’d never been hurt before, even if it was over such a small thing.
“I was a kid, Gwen.” Lance tried to defend himself. “And I was probably already tipsy on wine.”
“I know,” I said abruptly. “I just thought our acquaintance mattered to you in some way, even if it was just as friends. But I know better now. I realised that you were just a selfish ass who wanted to play with my feelings to pass the time until you found another way to entertain yourself.” I made to move past him, but he took hold of my upper arms.
“That’s not fair. I didn’t even know that you wanted me to write. I thought you didn’t care.”
I didn’t want him to say anything that could possibly change the way I felt about him in that moment.
“You’re right. It was a very long time ago. And I’m glad you didn’t write. It’s for the better.”
“If that was the case then why are you still upset with me?”
I wanted this to end. I wanted to go back to my rooms and crawl under the covers and wait until I was well enough to leave this damn place and its damn prince.
“Because,” I said, pulling myself away from him. “Because it meant nothing to you. BecauseImeant nothing to you.”
And with that I finally walked away.
Chapter 31
Gwen
I took a deep breath and steadied myself on the horse.
In hindsight, it might not have been the best idea, but I’d been cooped up in that damned palace for days, and if I did not get out, I was afraid I would go mad somehow.
The weather had been miserable for the past week and today was the first day I could actually see the sun again.
I could walk almost completely normally with the cane but riding a horse was another thing. Then again, I wasn’t planning on doing anything drastic. I was simply going to take Bessie for a walk around the palace grounds.
Her hoof had healed nicely over the past few weeks, and she’d looked quite pleased to see me in the stables this morning. Although she was probably more interested in the apple in my hand.
I allowed my foot to dangle out of the stirrup, not wanting to put any extra pressure on it.
All the rain had turned the world into a brown, muddy mess and it was difficult to navigate our way in some places.
My fingers were stiff and cold despite the leather gloves I wore. I longed for spring, with its temperate days and flowers blooming everywhere. There were few things I detested more than the cold.
I wouldn’t go as far as the forest, so I made sure to turn Bessie around long before we’d reached the treeline. She seemed to be enjoying the little walk, sometimes stopping to sniff something on the ground.
Though I was not eager to admit it, I would miss her once I returned to Norrandale, something I knew was inevitable now that my injury had mostly healed, and I would be ready to travelsoon. I wondered how the others were faring. Had they taken Mistwood ? Had the army arrived? And what of my brother? Had he been taken prisoner? I had a sinking feeling in my chest that whatever was going on at Mistwood, it was not pleasant.
Part of me felt guilty for not being there with the others, but I was a liability with my injury, and so I told myself that I would only leave for Norrandale once King Cai had sent word that it was safe.
