Page 71 of Once Upon a Crown
But I was not myself. Something more than anger had taken possession of me. And I had no way of resisting it.
The thought worried me immensely.
Once I was sure most of the blood had been washed off, I had to find Elara.
I hurried out the door as I was putting on a new, clean shirt.
The palace hallways were filled with soldiers. They carried crates of food and weapons into the building, everything we’dbrought along with us from the camp. Many of them bowed their heads as I passed.
Somehow, I felt as though I should be the one bowing to them. Had it not been for their sacrifice and loyalty, I would not be walking the halls of my home once again.
I made my way towards the guest chambers Elara had occupied on her previous stay. She would probably want to clean up as well.
The morning sunlight peeked in through the windows. Had so many hours already passed since we’d arrived? We had yet to eat today, it being too early when we left the camp. Elara was probably hungry too. As soon as we’d talked, we would need to find something to eat, and then I needed to start getting matters back into order in the palace. But my first priority was her.
Part of me knew that the conversation to come would not be full of pleasantries. I had asked her not to use the dagger and she did anyway, and she had seen me brutally murder someone we both knew and used to care for.
I didn’t want to believe that the magic of the objects was somehow involved but I could not help but suspect it. Not after everything that had happened today and the way we’d defeated the Argonians. As much as I wanted to believe we were building a strong army, I did not want to be naive.
As I walked at a brisk pace towards Elara’s old chambers, I thought back to the way the dagger glinted in her hands before she’d killed the soldier. The way she’d been in possession of the necklace as we’d escaped Woodsbrook and all throughout the rebellion. How we’d escaped death time and time again, despite the circumstances. And if the objects had something to do with it, what would be the cost?
That, perhaps, scared me most of all, even more than having to face Aries in battle again. Whatever had happened today, Elara and I needed to talk about it urgently.
Or maybe I was looking for an excuse not to blame myself for taking another life. The life of someone I used to call brother. Maybe I did not like the person I was becoming.
I wrestled with all the thoughts in my mind, wondering if it had been the dagger, or if I’d just lost a part of myself that I would never find again.
Chapter 30
Gwen
The Evernean winter had graced us with a day of sunshine, and though it was still quite cold, there wasn’t a cloud in the sky. My ankle was feeling much better. I couldn’t run or ride yet, but it was a significant improvement over having to hobble along everywhere.
I took advantage of the nicer weather by having my morning tea out on the veranda, overlooking the gardens. I poured myself a fresh cup of the herbal tea and held it in my hands, hoping that it would warm my fingertips.
The taste of the tea was soothing, and I took frequent sips while paging through the latest book I’d borrowed from the library. This particular book was a romance, and while I preferred my tales to be more on the adventure side, it was a nice change of pace. Although I always found it frustrating when the two main characters took such a long time to get together when it was so obvious they belonged with each other.
The door to the veranda opened behind me and I dropped the book in my lap, looking back.
Lance looked equally surprised to see me.
“Pardon me.” He let out a cough. “I didn’t realise you’d be here.”
We hadn’t spoken since our last conversation in the library, when Lance had been extremely drunk, and I’d insulted him beyond reprimand. For the first time since I’d come to live at the Palace of Levernia, it felt as though he’d been avoiding me.
Not that I had much to complain about. But it was strange to see Lance so out of sorts. I almost wanted him to go back to normal so I could stop the pressing sensation that I should feel guilty for the way I’d acted.
“Just having some tea.” I held up my cup somewhat awkwardly.
“All right then.” It was clear he’d been planning to sit outside as well. “I shan’t bother you anymore.”
“No.” I used the table to pull myself up. “This is your palace. I shall get out of your way.”
“Technically it’s Elara’s palace,” he said with a hint of a smile as I grabbed my book.
“Still, you’ve lived here your whole life. It’s your home as much as it is hers.”
“I suppose.”
