Page 40 of Love Story
Exquisite. Yes.Andi had to remember to inhale. She searched his eyes. “For me, too.”
She thanked him for dinner and pulled herself away. Which wasn’t easy. Because all she wanted to do was find a pair of chairs and sit with him, get to know him better. Let his voice wash over her and his brown eyes look deeply into hers.
Enough, Andi,she told herself.He’ll go back to Amsterdam and you’ll never see him again.She tried to gather her senses as she took the elevator up to her room. Caleb had caught more than her attention. He had caught a piece of her heart. She steadied herself once she was inside her room. She took the puppy from his box. “Hey, little guy. I won’t let anything happen to you.” She held him up and pressed her cheek against his fur. “I promised.”
The puppy sniffed her, making a series of whimpers as he did.
“I know.” She nuzzled his face. “We’ll take a walk tomorrow morning, okay?”
This time the puppy yawned.
Andi found a towel in the bathroom and set it in the box. Poor baby. He had no idea his mother was gone. As long as he had someone to care for him, he was happy. Something about the little puppy made Andi think of the baby boy she gave up for adoption. Little Johnny Baxter, the child being raised by his adoptive parents, Luke and Reagan Baxter.
Andi thought about him often, wondering if in some way the child missed her. But the truth was, he had the most wonderful parents. Andi heard updates from Luke and Reagan a few times a year. Johnny was thriving. Andi had done the right thing. And now this little pup had the right parent, too.
Her.
Once the puppy was asleep in his box, Andi took her journal, sat near the window and began to write. Never mind that Cody was part of her past, or that Andi would break off their second engagement again if she had it to do over. She still felt a little unfaithful after her day with Caleb. She stared at the empty page and then—almost as if her heart was doing the talking—the pen began to move.
Dear Cody...His name still felt familiar on her tongue. In her soul. She sighed and continued.I’ll never send you this letter and you’ll never see it, but still I have to write it. This job stirs up incredibly deep thoughts, times when I feel like coming back to my hotel and crying for hours. Today it was a dog that died.She thought about Caleb, how he cared about the loss the same way she did.Anyway, all of it makes me wish you were here.She scribbled out that last part and tried again.All of it makes me remember you. The way we used to be. Back when I could just sit next to you and share with you. Feel your arm around my shoulders.
You were always the best listener, Cody. Your heart heard the things I said and you would do anything in the world to help me. A Bible verse or a hug, a walk along the beach. I felt safe with you. You loved with actions.... At least you used to. Before the end.She read what she’d written.What happened? I still don’t understand how it all faded away. Maybe I never will.
Her pen flew across the page, her thoughts clear.Sometimes I wonder where you are, and whether you think of me. Whether you’re mad at me.She hesitated.Please don’t be mad at me, Cody. You were distracted. Confused. I don’t know, but I know this—I couldn’t give you my life unless you really wanted me.
She felt again the full weight of walking away from him. Leaving Cody was one of the hardest things she’d ever done. She closed the journal and stared at the fading light outside. Eventually her heart would heal and she could move on. Maybe to someone like Caleb.
Maybe sooner than she thought.
Andi watched the way the city lights lit up a few stray cumulus clouds. Dozens of puffy white clouds had dotted the heavens the day she broke things off with Cody for the last time.
He had been finishing work at Oaks Christian, always the last one to leave after a football game. This one was on a Saturday afternoon, and Andi had been in the stands. Although Cody didn’t know that. He thought she was having lunch with her parents.
In reality she’d already had lunch with them, already told them she was going to break off the second engagement. She had their blessing, because of how he’d treated her. How he’d been so shut down emotionally.
Andi still couldn’t believe the roller coaster of emotions they’d both gone through from the time he found her in that coffee shop after their first broken engagement. He had offered to pray for her. That’s what had drawn her back into his life.
Back into his heart.
They ended up talking the next day, and hours later they met at the beach and talked until nearly midnight. He took her to dinner the next evening, and like that they were a couple again. During that time her parents had moved back to Bloomington for a year. Cody told her he was taking her to Indiana for a surprise birthday party for her mother.
Instead it turned out to be a surprise engagement party.
With all their family and friends watching, Cody asked her—a second time—to be his wife. What else could she say but yes? She loved him as much then as she had before.
It should have been a match that outshone the moon and stars. But a few months after they got back to Los Angeles, Cody began to withdraw. She’d be talking to him and he’d stare off at the sky. Like she wasn’t even there. Sometimes he’d be on his phone. Too busy to look up or notice her.
After a season of that, Andi had her answer.
So after that Saturday football game, Andi waited till everyone had cleared the bleachers and all the players had gone home. When she saw Cody return to the field carrying his gear bag, she walked down the stairs and met him.
She could still hear their conversation now.
“Andi?” He had stopped and set his gear bag down. “I thought you were at—”
“My parents and I... we went to lunch earlier.” She removed her sunglasses and looked into his eyes. “I need to talk to you.”
Even now when she looked back on the moment she was sure Cody had no idea what was coming. He took her hand and led her to a nearby sideline bench. “What is it? You look serious.”
