Page 13 of Her Rogue for Christmas
“And if you were?”He arched a brow.
“Then I would say I won our wager.”She wiggled her eyebrows playfully, genuinely pleased for him.She had hoped Eli would find happiness.If anyone deserved it, it was him.“And you owe me a boon.”
“Perhaps,” he conceded with a shrug.“Yet I feel as if I’m the true victor of our little wager.”He pushed away from the wall.“I have Gabriella, and she’s worth more than any boon you might request from me.Love isn’t something to be avoided, Elena.I know you feel something for a certain earl.”
She looked away.“I admit to no such thing,” she said, unable to meet his gaze.“I’m never marrying again, and love is not an emotion I care to claim.”
“You don’t love me?”he asked softly.“Is that why you felt comfortable locking me in a room with Gabriella?Do I mean so little to you?”
Her gaze snapped to his.“That’s not the same at all.You mean everything to me.I did that only so you’d finally admit how you feel about her.It was clear you loved her, and yet you resisted.”She had no regrets; she had locked him in with Gabriella before going to Theo that night, knowing Eli would eventually confess his heart.Gabriella and Eli belonged together—it was as simple as that.
“I could say the same about you,” he replied, his voice gentle.“You’re fighting your own feelings.”He sighed and shook his head.“But I won’t push you.Perhaps one day, you’ll allow yourself to love him, or perhaps you’ll choose to remain alone and guarded.I cannot force you to seek happiness.”He leaned forward and pressed a kiss to her cheek.“Thank you for caring about me, Elena.Now, if you’ll pardon me, I have a lady to see about a wedding.You’re welcome to attend the ceremony, should you wish to.”
He left her standing alone in the library, his words striking her heart like an anvil.He hadn’t said anything she hadn’t already considered herself.She had made a mistake.She should never have let Theo go.
Suddenly, she knew precisely what she needed to do.Theo had said his farewells and departed, but surely he hadn’t meant it.If she went to him, he would welcome her back.Elena closed her eyes, steadying her breath.She could no longer allow her fears to rule her.She had to take a leap of faith and trust in Theo.He had never given her any reason to doubt him.She believed he loved her, and now she needed only to find him and beg his forgiveness.
Theo sat in his study,attempting to focus on his account books, yet he couldn’t seem to concentrate.His vision blurred as he looked over the columns of numbers, and he knew it was a futile effort.All he could think about was Elena—and the devastating realization that he had lost her forever.He would never again hold her in his arms.
How had it come to this?He had thought, foolishly perhaps, that enough time had passed since her dreadful husband’s death.That now, at last, he might have a place in her life.But he had been utterly wrong in that assumption.
Still, he had no regrets about the night they’d shared.How could he?That night would remain forever cherished in his heart, a memory he could revisit even if he never saw her again.
“My lord,” his butler interrupted.“Pardon the intrusion.”
“What is it, Bivens?”Theo asked, glancing up.
“There’s a caller…”
Theo frowned.He wasn’t expecting visitors, especially during the Christmastide season when most people were with family.“Did they leave a card?”
“No, my lord,” Bivens replied, a hint of hesitation in his voice.“It’s…well, there is no delicate way to say this.It is a woman.”
Theo stood abruptly.He knew who he hoped had come to his door, but he dared not give in to such dangerous optimism.If he allowed himself to believe that Elena was here, in his home, he might truly lose his mind if it turned out otherwise.Swallowing, he closed his eyes briefly, bracing himself.“Bring her here,” he said, steeling himself for disappointment.
He moved to the window, looking out over the frozen, dormant garden awaiting the first bloom of spring.At the start of Lady Winston’s house party, he’d had high hopes for a joyous Christmastide—only to watch them crumble.He’d risked his heart for Elena’s love, and lost.Now he was left, a wretched man, resigned to the life that stretched out before him, empty and bleak.
“Theo,” a soft voice said behind him.
It was her voice.Yet surely, he was imagining it.He remained motionless, his heart pounding.He feared turning around, afraid to face either the joy or the despair her presence might bring.Slowly, he turned to see her standing there.She was as beautiful as he remembered, her cheeks flushed from the cold.
“Elena,” he breathed, scarcely believing his eyes.“Why are you here?”
She crossed the room, standing before him.“I made a mistake.”
“Did you?”He raised a brow, uncertain, holding himself back.“And what mistake would that be?”
“I should never have asked for only one night with you.”
He sighed.“I already told you?—”
“Let me finish,” she said softly, her gaze earnest.“I should have demanded much more than that.One night was not enough.Not for us.”She reached up to cup his cheek.“A lifetime wouldn’t be enough.I love you, my dearest, and I owe you an apology.I know you didn’t ask for one, but you deserve it.I used you for my own selfish purposes, and you allowed it because you’re a good man, wanting only to treat me as something precious.”
“You are everything to me,” he replied quietly.“No one else could mean more.”
“I know,” she said, her voice trembling.“Please forgive me, love.Tell me it isn’t too late, and that you still want me.”
Theo closed his eyes, taking in a steadying breath.He prayed this wasn’t some fevered dream.If it were, he wouldn’t survive the reality.“My darling,” he murmured, his tone soft, welcoming.“I love you beyond measure.I want forever with you.Always.We don’t have to marry if that is your concern.I only want you near, for the rest of my days.”
