Page 64 of The Duke's Indecent Match
Because her back was to the door, it was only a prickling of her senses that made Kalina aware there was an addition to their audience.
She turned to look over her shoulder.Hereford and Julianna were standing there, listening intently as well.Her husband’s gaze met hers for just a moment before he looked away.Julianna was studying her closely, as though she was trying to figure Kalina out.
“Julianna!Did you know that elephants are so big you can ride them?”Fiona asked as she jumped up and ran over to her sister.Grabbing Julianna’s hand, she tried to pull her into Kalina’s room.
“I did not know that.I have never seen an elephant before.”Julianna resisted Fiona’s attempts to drag her forward.Lifting her gaze to Kalina, she smiled, but it did not reach her eyes.“I apologize; you must be tired.We’ll leave you to rest.”
Fiona made a disappointed noise, but at her sister’s urging, she quit the room after waving over her shoulder at Kalina.Emma glided noiselessly after her, though she smiled and nodded at Kalina before she left, and her smile seemed genuine.After his sisters were gone, Hereford stood in the doorway, looking about the room, not meeting her eyes.
She wondered when the last time he had been in this room.
Possibly when his mother had been alive.He was looking at it as though he did not recognize it.Or perhaps he was just that determined to avoid looking at her.Nervously waiting for him to say something, she was aware of Margaret on the side of the room, appearing to make herself as small as possible but also watching Hereford closely.If he did anything to discomfit Kalina, her maid would defend her.
Kalina would have to have a word with Margaret.
She was uncertain whether she could stop Hereford from firing the maid if he decided to.Though her understanding was that, as lady of the household, she was nominally in charge of the staff, especially her own lady’s maid, he was still the duke.The head of household.
That rankled because it did not seem fair that her husband controlled the money she had brought to the marriage.She kept her portion, and that was it.But there was nothing she could do about that.
She could, hopefully, keep Margaret from speaking out of turn and being fired.
“Supper is at six o’clock,” he said after a long moment, still not meeting her gaze.“Unless you would prefer a tray in your room?”
Though the notion tempted, Kalina would not be such a coward.It was better to start as she meant to go on, and she was determined to make a good try at this marriage.This life.
Besides, she’d enjoyed Fiona’s company, and Emma’s, though the latter had been much quieter.Eating together would also give her a notion of how to gauge the Percy sisters’ reactions to any revelations their brother made to them this afternoon.Kalina lifted her chin.
“I will eat dinner with the family.”
He nodded, started to turn.
Stopped.
“It will not be… there has not been time to send Miss Milford to the village for any additional food.The meal will be…” His voice trailed off again.
“I am sure whatever is served will be filling, and that is all I need,” Kalina said firmly.If she was able to eat very much at all.
Hereford nodded again and turned, pulling the door shut behind him.Both Kalina and Margaret let out their breath at the same time.
“He’s a bit of a cold fish,” Margaret muttered, turning back to her task.
But he had not been.
Not until he’d been trapped in a future with her.
Tears pricked her eyes again, and Kalina took a deep breath, pushing them away.Sometimes, it felt like all she did was push down her emotions.Her wants.Her desires.
Shaking her head, she got up from the bed and went to assist Margaret in sorting through the jewelry she’d brought.It did no good to dwell on such things.
None of it could be changed, anyway.
Though… as she was putting her favorite rose diamond necklace to the side, it occurred to Kalina that her life was more her own now than it had ever been before.She’d done what she had sworn to do.She had married a duke.Her father was now so well-connected, his father would not be able to completely ignore him anymore.
That had been her goal for long enough that she felt the lack of it like a void.What did she want for herself now?
What kind of future could she make here at Hereford Hall?
Staring down at the glittering gems in her hand, she realized she had no idea what she wanted now that there were no expectations laid at her feet.She could finally choose for herself, and she did not know what she desired because she had never thought about what she might want for herself.
