Page 83 of Research with Rivals
“I’ll happily remain the exception to your every rule.” He leaned forward but seemed to stop himself, as if he’d remembered we were in the library. Even the way he held my hand was likely pushing the limits of propriety here.
I wanted to stay in this space with him longer. After this, everything would change. Carter would make his decision. I glanced at my experiment in the window. I wanted to stay in the space where we grew together rather than apart. My wants blended as I imagined a world where I had both Ambrose in my life and the Vesten historian position. I had to assume that picture in my head allowed the words to slip out. “Save that for later.”
Once they were out, I desperately wanted them to be true. But how could it be possible? I didn’t know what I’d do if Ambrose got the position. Would he move to Compass Lake? It wasn’t that I would begrudge him his success, but it certainly wouldn’t make things easy for us. And if I got the position, Mom and I had talked of moving. Well, even that wasn’t a guarantee anymore. Not with my father’s return.
Everything felt up in the air, but as with our attempt to appease the blood magic, the only way out was through.
Ambrose nodded, his face resolute, determined. He knew as much as I did what my words meant. Knowing Ambrose, he was studying every tick of my jaw and narrowing of my eyes as I tried to will a future I couldn’t see into existence.
The bubble we were in was about to burst.But what if it doesn’t have to?
Our breaths were deep, and we finally stared at each other. “Do it now,” I said.
He kept my hand wrapped in his as he closed his eyes. I followed, letting my fire find the connection point between us. Every time I searched for the rope that led from me to him, it was easier to find. My fire skittered along it to the center, to the tie that neither of us had been able to break.
His heat met mine at the impenetrable knot. I was proud of Ambrose for doing this. Everything about this test would have earned his father’s disapproval. Not only had we accidentally bound ourselves together, but we’d tested breaking the connection—an unprecedented test, a test so rare the Compass Points and gods didn’t know how to do it. Ambrose had avoided this kind of magic for so long. He thought his caution avoided any risk associated with blood magic—any connection to living things—but I liked to think I’d taught him differently. I’d taught him that there was always risk associated with blood magic. People were unpredictable, as we had learned firsthand, but I was confident in what he would do to break our connection.
Smoke drifted up from where his heat pressed into the knot. “It’s fraying,” he whispered.
My fire could sense the weakening magic. I squeezed his fingers tighter as he worked. My other hand rose to my chest, as if I could feel the break in our connection. I couldn’t, but the tightening of my body felt like a warning—like something was coming, even if I wasn’t sure what.
The tether between us snapped.
Ambrose gasped. We collapsed into each other’s arms, forgetting again that we were in the library, forgetting that anyone around us could see. Our foreheads met softly, and we shared breaths, neither of us able to catch our own.
I just needed to know he was still there. My awareness of him was gone. That space in my chest where the discomfort had beenseemed empty, like a well that hoped to fill with the first rain of the season.
“It worked,” he whispered. He didn’t even try to hide the lingering disappointment in his voice.
“I know.” And I did. We could be more scientific about it. We could wait until we separated and didn’t feel the insistent tug in the direction of the other to declare victory, but this test didn’t require it. There was a bone-deep knowing that the magic had severed. As I put a few inches of space between us and studied Ambrose, I wondered if everything else we were building had been disrupted.
Only time would tell.
“Hi,” I said.
“Hi,” Ambrose replied with a dopey smile on his face. “Want to?—”
“Your little knot—or whatever you were calling it—seems to be gone.” Lord Arctos clapped his hands together loudly as he walked across the room. “Just in time. Carter will be here tomorrow for you to test it on us.”
34
Ambrose
Lord Arctos’s presence didn’t allow time to process what happened. The magic had worked. I’d dissolved an unprecedented magical bond between two living beings—between a fae and half-fae. Discomfort stirred in my stomach, but I couldn’t regret it, even if it was everything my father warned against.
Evelyn knew what this step meant to me. I was sure she was surprised I hadn’t fought her harder on being the one to do it. Something warmed in my chest at how deeply she understood me. She’d known I needed to decide for myself the direction of my future—the direction of my experiments with blood magic. And she’d provided an opportunity.
My chest throbbed a little. It was odd not to sense the connection to Evelyn anymore. Did I miss it? Or was I worried about what the dissolution of the bond meant—what we’d have to face next?
One of us will be chosen for Vesten historian now.
Our gazes met and held, a million conversations dying to be had, but Lord Arctos’s insistent cough behind us told me now was not the time for them.
“Yes, we broke the connection,” Evelyn said, her brown eyes still on me.
Lord Arctos coughed again, demanding our attention. When we finally turned to face him, he had a hand on his hip and another gesticulating. “I’m a god, of course I can see you’ve broken the connection…” His head tilted as if questioning something else.
“You didn’t give us much time,” I said, “before having Carter follow us.”
