Page 86 of More Than Chemical
“Yes.” This time I caught my breath and let out a long exhale to prepare. “Okay, so I need to tell you both something important about Coach Bianchini that I don’t want you to tell anyone else.”
Emma locked in her pace to mine. “What in the world, Ade?”
I squeezed my eyes shut and grimaced. “He’s my dad.”
Emma halted with a gasp.
Priya stopped midstride. Her face contorted.
Since I was still jogging, I pivoted backward and paused.
I held my breath and waited for them to say something, anything.
“I thought…” Priya said. “I thought you said your dad lived out of state, and that’s why we haven’t met him.”
“Yeah, I’m really sorry about that. I lied.”
They began to walk hesitantly, and I dropped in alongside them. I told them the entire gut-wrenching story. From the news reporters that had camped out on the street in front of my house trying to get a statement from anyone who would stop, to the last months of my senior year falling apart, to graduation day, when I’d been so badly humiliated that I’d gone home and taken a Vicodin, the ones prescribed to me back when I’d had my wisdom teeth pulled out, and then my mom finding me drugged out in my bed.
There had been so much pain inside me, and I’d just wanted it to go away.
Then I brought them up to the present—the trial having started, my mom being there, and Jay telling me I should go because my dad is the only dad I’ll ever have.
After all that, I half expected them to turn and run from me as fast as they could. But like Jay promised, they didn’t. They were true friends.
“This is so horrible.” Priya’s eyes were still wide in shock. “I don’t even know what to say.”
“I know I should have told you both sooner, but I’ve been trying really hard for people not to find out. Jay knows, of course.”
“And your brother—is your brother Eric Bianchini?” Emma asked.
I nodded.
“He is so hot,” she mumbled.
I laughed out loud. “I was expecting you to get all judgy on me, Emma, not obsess about my brother.”
“I can’t believe I’ve known you since August, and all of this time, I could have met your hot hockey-playing brother and you kept this from us!”
Priya nodded. “Not only that, but the fact is, you’re famous.”
“You mean famously hated.”
“Back to your brother.” Emma held her chin high. “They shouldn’t have taken him off the list for the Hobey Baker Award. It wasn’t fair.”
“I wouldn’t worry about him. He’s doing fine.” I waved my hand. “Way better than me. He’s playing for the AHL in Canada.”
“So why aren’t you at the trial?” Priya asked.
“Honestly?"
“Yes. What’s holding you back?”
I chewed on the inside of my cheek. A difficult question. “At first, I thought it was resentment. Because I was angry at my dad. But now…well…I think the truth is I’m afraid. I’m afraid of people finding out who I am. I’m afraid of being judged all over again. I don’t think I can take it a second time. Being the target of so much hatred.” A shiver went down my arms. “I have PTSD just thinking about it. It must be the reason I can’t sleep.”
“I’m so sorry, Ade,” Priya said, hugging me. “So very sorry.”
Emma joined us, putting her arms around both of us. “Me too.”
