Page 118 of More Than Chemical
Priya’s announcement wasn’t a surprise to me compared to how Jay and Emma were reacting, but the fact that she’d gone through with the breakup was…well…unexpected.
“When?” Emma asked.
“Yesterday.”
“But you and Luke are the real deal,” Emma said. “I’m so confused.”
“If you three weren’t my close friends, I’d probably tell you that it’s a trial breakup. That we just need some time apart. But that would be a complete lie. The truth is I don’t want to be with him anymore.”
“Whoa,” Jay said.
“I know. I’m a horrible, cruel person, aren’t I?”
“No.” I stood straight. “Good for you. If that’s the way you feel, then it’s best not to drag things out.” But I couldn’t relate to her situation at all. I’d never had a supportive boyfriend like Luke in my life. I mean, I’d had Dallas for a brief moment, but that had turned into a disaster.
“What about you, Ade?” Priya asked me. “Truth, Dare, Double Dare, Promise or Repeat?”
My body stilled. I supposed I should take the dare, but I didn’t want to. I didn’t have the spirit for it.
“Truth,” I said.
“Why are you acting so weird?” Priya asked. “Like asking whether or not any of us have been in love before?”
I sighed. I was hoping for something more likeWould you rather share a fantasy suite with Justin Bieber or Tom Hiddleston?That would be easy. Tom Hiddleston as Loki, hands down.
I took a deep breath. “Last week, you two came to the verdict, which was lovely and thoughtful, and I greatly appreciated your presence, but deep down inside, I was hoping Dallas would come.”
All three of them paused and stared at me.
“Are you in love with him?” Emma asked.
I shrugged. “I don’t know. That’s why I was asking if any of you had ever been in love before and what that felt like, so I can figure it out.”
There was a long pause.
Priya put an arm around me. “It sounds to me like you’re not over him, and that’s okay.”
“Right, Ade,” Emma said. “Look, it took me months to get over Thad from last fall, and in the end, I’m not even sure I really liked him to begin with.”
“And as soon as you hear from Plunkett, I’d meet up with Dallas,” Priya said. “Then you can see where you two stand.”
Jay glanced at his phone. “Uber’s here.”
He held the front door open for us, and we raced to the car. The interior was just the right temperature. The driver confirmed our destination, we buckled ourselves in, and the car sped away.
Next to me, Jay said, “If you want my opinion, it doesn’t matter if you love him, like him, or hate him. Something else happened these past few weeks. You developed courage. I’m proud of you.”
“Wow, thanks.” My voice softened, and my heart blossomed. “That’s really nice of you to say, but can you remind me what exactly I have done to earn your high esteem?”
“You made peace with your dad, you accepted what happened to you and your family, you don’t care what people think about who you are, and your grades are improving.” He shifted in the seat. “That’s a lot.”
“Maybe, but then why am I still not sleeping?”
“You will. It’s just going to take time for your body to adjust to this new you.”
I smiled back at him. He was right. I’d come a long way, and I was ready. Ready to believe in myself.
Forty-Three
