Page 55 of Four Weddings to Fall in Love
“Yes, he told me.”
Way to go, Freddie.Pinning the demise of your fake relationship on your fake girlfriend.
“I don’t understand,” Mom says.“How could someone break up withhim?”
This is the perfect illustration of the difference in how she treats us.If my boyfriend dumped me, she would blame me, not him, no matter what I said.But Freddie?No, he couldn’t possibly be at fault.
I can’t help feeling resentful that I did the “right” thing—earned a couple of degrees and got a job that’s considered respectable to people like our parents—yet I’m the one who can never do right in my mother’s eyes.Familiar frustration boils inside me.
A small part of me is tempted to rat Freddie out to my mother.Tell her that he never had a girlfriend.But even if my brother and I aren’t close, I’d never do that.Besides, Mom probably wouldn’t believe me.He beloved son faking a relationship?No way.
“I’ll have to find someone for him,” Mom says.
“I’m sure Freddie can manage by himself.”
“I know people in Vancouver.”
This leads to a long monologue about who she knows in Vancouver and which of them have appropriate daughters for Freddie.One young woman is considered an option until my mother remembers that she was “a little wild” in university and dyed her hair blue.
“What about you?”Mom asks.“Have you seen Max?”
I can’t help laughing.If only my mom knew what I was doing on Saturday night!
But I’m not even going to tell her that I had a date.If Max and I are still seeing each other at Carl’s wedding—just under a month from now—I’ll say something.I think that’s a reasonable amount of time to wait.
“No,” I say.
“Aiyah!You don’t have all the time in the world—”
“I’m not a package of meat at the grocery store.I don’t have an expiration date.”
“Do you know what I heard?Sometimes, if the meat hasn’t sold, they put on stickers with a new expiration date—”
“Fascinating.”
“Why are you being sarcastic?I’m telling you something important.Yes, a woman can get married at any age, but if you want children, youdohave an expiration date.”
“Look, Mom, can we not do this right now?I’m aware that fertility declines with age and menopause is a thing—you’ve told me before.”
She clucks her tongue.“I just don’t want you to miss this opportunity.”
I decide to placate her a little.“Max and I have been texting.I have everything under control.”
“What did he say?”
“We’re not talking about this anymore, okay?I don’t want my family involved in my dating life.The fact that Gladys had us all sitting at the same table at the wedding—that really was a bit much.”
“Why?It’s important for families to get to know each other.”
“But not so early on.”
“I think Gladys believes she’s better than me.All three kids getting married this year?She hasn’t said so, but I can tell.”
It takes another twenty minutes to get my mother off the phone.When I finally end the call, I rub my forehead and close my eyes.I need a moment.Dealing with my mother can be draining.And now I’m actually dating someone, and if it progresses, I’ll have another mother to deal with.
Why am I setting myself up for this?
I can’t just tell myself that we’ve only been on one date and I shouldn’t worry about it yet…because I’ve already met his freaking mom.True, she was nothing like my mother, nothing like Troy’s mother.But she’s probably different when she’s not at a wedding banquet.
