Page 163 of Not Another Yesterday
Ashley gasps, clutching her husband’s arm. “Oh my god. What happened?”
But Cormac is still looking at me. His eyes drop to the scar below my eye, then the much-smaller one on my top lip. His jaw tightens.
“She gave you that,” he says quietly.
My shoulders stiffen. I nod. “Yeah.”
“God,” he sighs, closing his eyes. “I don’t even know what to say.” He looks back at me. “How bad was it for you?”
I hate talking about it. Hate remembering. “Bad,” I say, staring at the floor. “Really bad.”
“Can I ask what happened?” Mark asks, ignoring the look his mom shoots him.
I look at him. Like, really look at him. There are no scars. No bruises. No cuts. No signs at all that his parents ever laid a hand on him. His eyes are bright, his face relaxed. His shoulders don’t look like they bear the weight of the world. He doesn’t come across as wearing heavy armor, always anticipating the next fight, the next hit. He looks like he had a great upbringing, was loved and doted on by two caring parents. His body language is open and inviting, rather than closed off and protective, as he sits next to his dad. I wouldn’t be caught dead sitting next to my mom.
I could leave this house right now, never asking a single question, and still I’d know, without a shadow of doubt, that Cormac managed to do what I so desperately want for myself.
He broke the cycle of abuse for his family.
“She beat me within an inch of my life almost two years ago,” I finally say. “I was in a coma for a week.”
Ashley gasps.
“Rica beat Ronan so badly,” my dad says, “he had over twenty broken bones. Collapsed lungs. A ruptured spleen. I wasn’t sure he was going to make it. That’s when I found out what had been happening… that she’d been abusing him his whole life.”
“God,” Cormac mutters, rubbing his chin, lost in thought. “I never imagined she would… that she…” He shakes his head.
“Your mother came to my house last November,” my dad says.
Cormac’s head snaps up.
“She stopped by after visiting Rica in prison. Said she wanted to talk to Ronan. To tell him about Rica’s past. About what your dad did to her… and to you.”
Cormac’s expression hardens. He says nothing for a long moment, lips pressed into a thin line.
“My dad was abusive, and his dad before him, and so on,” Cormac sighs. “My baby sister…”
Ashley’s hand moves to the back of his neck, gently stroking. She knows. She’s always known he had another sister.
Cormac swallows hard. “My dad would hit Rica and me pretty regularly. It was always about respect and obedience. If we talked back, if we got bad grades, if we made him look bad in any way—he’d lash out. And he hit my mom, too. If she tried to defend us, he’d turn on her. If I stepped in, it just made things worse. He loved using the broom handle.”
My jaw tightens. “My mom hit me with the broom handle, too,” I say quietly.
Cormac meets my eyes and nods with a look that holds nothing but understanding. No shock. No pity. Just empathy.
“My sister and I… we were never good enough for him,” he says. “I gave up trying pretty early, but Rica didn’t. She kept trying to meet his impossible standards. She was obedient. So smart. A hard worker. Sweet—so damn sweet. I loved her more than anything.”
He pauses, rubbing his hands together as if trying to warm himself.
“I tried to protect her. But every time I did, he’d just hit her harder. Hit me harder. It didn’t stop anything. Just made it all more brutal.”
Cormac leans forward slightly, voice quieter now. “On my eighteenth birthday, we had a bad fight. He wanted me to enlist in the military. I refused. I knew it would provoke him, but I couldn’t keep doing what he wanted. He called me a worthless screwup, said I’d never be anything, and then he tried to beat me into submission. Pretty sure he broke a couple ribs. Two fingers. Probably my nose. I had a cut under my left eye.”
He touches a small scar on his cheekbone.
“That night, I left. I packed what I could, took the little cash I had, and drove off. I didn’t say goodbye. I just… left. I sold my car at a junkyard, bought a piece-of-shit replacement, and drove until I landed here in Camden. I started going by Mac instead of Cormac. Took Ashley’s last name when we got married. I never looked back.”
He breathes in deeply, voice shaking.
