Page 137 of Not Another Yesterday
He snorts. “That’s a very real concern.”
I groan, the weight of it all finally breaking through. “How am I supposed to do this, man?” I sink into one of the creaky office chairs and drop my head in my hands. “How am I supposed to—”
God, it hits me like a dumbbell to the chest.
Cat and I are having a baby.
I’m going to be a dad. I’m only turning nineteen in June… I have the unprocessed weight of my mother’s dark family history on my shoulders, and I have no idea how to protect Cat, let alone a baby, from what might lurk inside me.
“By taking it one day at a time,” Shane says. “There’s no point in overthinking this right now.”
“Easy for you to say.”
He lowers himself in the chair next to me, draping an arm over my shoulder. “Yeah, I know. But you’re not alone, Ran. You have Cat and me and Stevie. And, yeah, your families are probably going to freak the fuck out at first, but they’ll come around. Try not to stress.”
“Dude, have you even met me?” I deadpan. “It’s what I do. I stress about shit.”
He laughs. “Sorry, forgot who I was talking to for a second.”
Somehow, I already feel lighter.
“When is Cat officially moving in?” he asks.
I blink. “Uh, I… I haven’t thought that far. Are you sure you want a newborn in your apartment?”
“You meanourapartment? It’s your place, too. And what, you’d just… put the kid in storage?”
I shrug. “I don’t know. Find another place?”
“Fuck that,” Shane says. “I’m not about to kick you out just because you couldn’t keep your dick in your pants.”
I groan. “You’re such an asshole.”
“But I’m a supportive asshole,” he says with a grin. “Plus, your kid can only benefit from spending its early years around Uncle Shane.” He pretends to wipe something off his shoulder with a smug look.
That does it. I laugh. “Uncle Shane? You sure about that?”
“Fuck yes. That kid is going to be a badass.”
“No doubt about that. I’m just wondering if you’re really set on ‘Uncle Shane’ or if you’d consider something… less creepy-sounding.”
Shane always manages to make me feel better about the heaviness in my life. There’s a reason why he and Cat are such anchors for me.
“Whatever the kid wants to call me, I’m cool with.” That smug but soft-ass look is back on his face.
“Damn, Ran,” he says suddenly, eyes wide like it just hit him. Again. “You’re gonna be adad.”
“Don’t say it out loud,” I mutter. “It makes it too real.”
Friday, May 19th
Ronan
Today’s the day.
The day Cat and I march into battle—or at least to the dinner table—armed with a heavy dose of anxiety and the earth-shattering news that my stupid ass managed to get her knocked up. At eighteen. Out of wedlock. Days—maybe evenminutes—after I somehow, miraculously, convinced her to take me back after I broke her heart in the most spectacular way possible.
So yeah. Should be a peaceful, drama-free gathering. Can’t wait.Insert heavy, soul-crushing sarcasm.
