Page 190 of Not Another Yesterday
I can’t even walk upright, each of the three steps from the wheelchair to the car slow and hunched over.
I would’ve preferred going back to Ronan’s apartment, but between his classes and work, I know he wouldn’t be around much. My mom wants someone to keep an eye on me at all times for the next couple of weeks anyway, and I don’t have the strength to argue.
Luckily, I don’t anticipate having to miss much school—a week at most, since there are no classes next week and the fall semester of my sophomore year in college starts the week after that.
“Do you have to work tonight?” I ask Ronan as we pull up to my house just before noon.
He hesitates, chewing on his bottom lip. “Well… technically, no. Shane offered to cover for me. But…” His eyes flick to mine, cautious. “If it’s okay with you, I’d kind of like to go in. I could use the distraction.”
He says it like a confession. Like something he’s ashamed to admit.
And as much as I want him here—want him beside me every second—I get it. He’s hurting, too. Devastated. And he copes by moving, by doing, by distracting himself. Healthy or not, I’m notabout to lecture him on grief when I haven’t even figured out how to handle my own.
“Yeah,” I say softly. “Okay.”
Ronan gives me a small, grateful smile, then rounds the car to help me out. The moment I’m upright, he scoops me into his arms and carries me to the house.
My parents are already waiting.
My dad opens the door for us, greeting us both with a warm smile, his whole demeanor radiating a kindness toward Ronan I haven’t seen in… well, ever.
“I put fresh linens on your bed, Kitty,” my mom says sweetly, already moving to lead us upstairs.
“Ronan,” my dad calls after us, “I’d like a quick word with you once you’ve deposited Cat upstairs.”
Ronan nods, then follows my mom up the stairs to my room, carrying me like I weigh nothing. He gently lowers me onto my bed, adjusting me against the stack of perfectly fluffed pillows.
“Be right back, I guess,” he says with a touch of skepticism.
As Ronan steps out of the room, my mom trails after him, thankfully leaving the door wide open. Which means I can heareverythingmy dad says to him next.
“You know,” my dad begins, his voice low, “I really wanted to hurt you when you broke up with Cat.”
My heart stutters. I frown, already shifting in bed, tempted to make my way downstairs and tell him to knock it off.
“I don’t blame you, sir,” Ronan says, calm and sincere. “It was a stupid move on my part. Probably the dumbest thing I’ve ever done, because Cat… she’s the best thing that ever happened to me.”
There’s a pause. A long one. And when my dad finally speaks again, his voice has softened. “Yeah. She is.”
Another silence settles between them, heavy with all the unsaid things.
“I wasn’t sure I could forgive you for hurting her,” my dad says. “Even after she did. I was hell-bent on hanging on to that grudge. You didn’t see her cry herself to sleep every night for two months. And as a father… watching that, knowing there was nothing I could do to take her pain away? That was hell. Pure and simple.”
Ronan doesn’t rush to respond. When he does, his voice is thick.
“I’m sorry,” he says. “I know it doesn’t make a lot of sense, but I never wanted to hurt her. I only ever wanted to keep her safe.”
“I believe you,” my dad says without a hint of doubt. “I know you’ve been through a lot. Things no kid should have to go through. And I know that stuff shaped you. How you think, how you love, how you protect. Your heart was in the right place, even if your choices didn’t always reflect that.”
Ronan is quiet. I can almost picture him standing there, eyes lowered but listening closely.
My dad clears his throat. “I wasn’t able to wrap my head around that until now. I was hurt for Cat. You see, Ronan, the thing is that I, too, want nothing more than to keep my children safe, and I wasn’t so sure that Cat’s heart was safe with you. She’d already been through something awful with that other guy, and then you came along. And damn, she fell so fast and so hard for you, only to have her heart ripped out of her chest again. As a dad, that pissed me off enormously. And then you two got back together, but I guess I wasn’t so quick to forgive you. I was cautious, you know?”
“I could tell,” Ronan says earnestly.
“I bet you could.” My dad chuckles dryly. “I was hard on you. I’ll admit that. From the moment I heard about you over two years ago now, I decided I wasn’t okay with you in Cat’s life. I judged you before I ever met you. I’d heard about your past, and instead of giving you a chance, I focused on every little thing that could confirm what I’d already decided: that you weren’t right for her.”
He pauses again, this time longer.
