Page 137 of When It's Us
I trail behind, calling out to Jordan to wait. He’s been around long enough to know the rules here. He stops to shoot me a grin while Wren opens the gate.
Hudson leads Daisy out, and Hank follows with Apollo, a hand on Jordan’s shoulder like it’s the most natural thing in the world. Tate talks to Daisy like they’re old friends, and Jordan bounces in place in the dirt while Hudson adjusts the stirrups for him.
And for a second, I forget. I forget that my heart sits shattered in my chest. That I feel like a shell of myself today, just trying to survive and be a good mom for my boys.
But then Tate calls out, “Mom, is Hutch coming?”
I stiffen, trying to appear unaffected by his innocent question. “I don’t know, baby,” I say softly. “Enjoy your ride, okay?”
My voice cracks at the end, enough for Wren to notice.
She slides up beside me, her hands in the back pockets of her jeans. “I know you said everything was okay, but I don’t believe you.”
I take a deep breath, eyes on my boys, and hope my voice doesn’t give away my inner turmoil. We’re leaving soon, and my life doesn’t feel anything like it did when I first left for Timber Forge. In fact, things feel more chaotic now than they did then.
“Anxious to get back, I guess,” I lie through my teeth.
Wren nods and watches me quietly for a minute before looking back to where both boys are now on their respective horses. “And you and Hutch?”
I shake my head. She must understand on some level, because instead of talking more, she wraps her arm around my waist and drops her head to my shoulder.
I let myself lean into her, for a second, like I might fold if I don’t.
The breeze shifts again, and the screen door creaks open behind us.
“Hey,” Nora calls out. She’s followed behind by Duke, who’s got Hazel on one hip and Emily holding Amelia in one arm and a bottle in the other. “I heard there were two little boys out here ready to ride.”
Wren lifts her head and grins. “You heard right.”
Paige comes out next, in a unicorn hoodie and sparkly boots. Finn steps out onto the porch too, cradling a mug and looking too put-together for a woman days away from giving birth. “Ginger,” she says softly, and pulls me into a hug before I can brace for it.
I blink hard. It’s almost too much. Nearly everyone I love all in one place.
There’s laughter in the paddock, Jordan squealing with delight as Mystic snorts and tosses her head. Tate’s chatting away to Hank like he’s known him forever, while Hudson reaches up to adjust Jordan’s helmet. Patient.
All of it feels like a snapshot of the life I almost had.
I let the chatter rise around me—Nora talking with her mom and dad, Paige teasing her dad about forgetting sunscreen again, Wren calling out to Hank to remind him not to let Tate eat horse treats—jokingly, of course.
This was never really going to be my life. And on some level, I knew that this feeling of belonging was borrowed at best. I’m just the best friend from out of town, the single mom with tired eyes and a hollow feeling in her chest.
The boys call to me, voices full of laughter, and I wave back with a smile that I hope doesn’t wobble.
I don’t know how I’m supposed to walk away from this. Because the second I do, it’s going to feel like leaving home.
Hutch
Iwalktowardtheroom like I’m headed to my own execution. The door’s cracked. I hear laughter inside—Hudson’s low chuckle, baby Huck snorting through a sob, and a lighter, softer voice that doesn’t belong to my family members.
Ginger.
I pause outside the door, breath shallow, hand flexing at my side like I’m grasping for the strength to go in. Or a lifeline. Maybe both.
Wren spots me first when I step inside. She’s standing near the foot of the hospital bed. She gives me a small, cautious smile that doesn’t reach her eyes.
Hudson’s grinning so big his face might split in two.
Ginger stands beside him—right fucking beside him,and I’m instantly envious of my brother. Her red hair is tied into a loose braid, and the soft sleeves of her sweater are pushed up to her elbows. She’s cooing at the baby, clutching a little stuffed dinosaur, and absolutely entranced.
