Page 66 of Let It Snow
"Nothing special, really." Snow continues after a while. "Theo has a husband; he never planned on leaving him. The guy, Tim, is an omega, so he can’t go into rut, and Theo would complain sometimes that the heat cycles were hard for them. One day Theo asked me directly if I’d help him during one. He said his husband had agreed to open their marriage."
I stare at him. For a nineteen-year-old, the idea of wild, passionate sex with an omega in heat must have been tempting. I can’t really blame him. And yet the way he talks about it makes me uneasy.
Twelve years, that’s not casual. There had to be some attachment.
Snow seems to sense my discomfort. He goes quiet, his face thoughtful. Then he adds, almost dryly, "Long story short, wenever had a normal date. It was always just meeting up and fucking. Nothing more."
I swallow hard and glance out the window. In some ways, he doesn’t have more experience than I do. But in others… I can only wonder. Does he love sex? Is his sex drive strong? That would be awesome, since I walk around with all this pent-up energy myself, sporting wood more often than I’d like.
The thought stirs something inside me, a curiosity that feels almost uncontrollable.
I wonder if it will happen tonight. Will I finally have anal sex with another person for the first time?
Gosh, I hate forcing my closed throat to speak, but I do it anyway. I push through, "Was he your only sexual partner?"
Snow grimaces slightly, clearly not comfortable with the topic. It’s not shame exactly, but something else, as if he doesn’t think it matters or doesn’t want to dwell on it.
"No. Over the years a few other parents, mostly single omegas, asked for my help during their heats. But those weren’t relationships, Summer. No dates, nothing like that. It was only sex."
He looks at me steadily, his voice firm.
"I’ve never had a real boyfriend, nor have I ever been in love."
The silence that follows is heavy.
In love? It feels so… alien, far away. We’re only just beginning to know each other. I like him a lot, I’m drawn to him, but the thought of something more between us feels like diving into an unknown ocean. Exciting and scary at the same time.
What lies ahead of us?
Snow pulls into a big parking lot.
I notice families with kids getting out of nearby cars, and I feel a little self-conscious. Maybe this place is mostly for kids. Are we the only couple here? Looks like it.
We walk into the oceanarium and buy our tickets.
The complex is beautiful. First we pass through several massive halls, each with towering tanks of fish and sea creatures. But the main attraction is a long tunnel stretching hundreds of yards along the ocean floor, right through a coral reef.
And then something nice happens. As we step into the tunnel, Snow reaches for my hand.
For a second, I flinch; touching another person still requires some barriers in me to break, but the moment our skin comes into contact, a wave of relief washes over me.
It’s better that way; my mind clears, the fog disappears. I know I’ll be able to talk to him normally now, without pushing through the pain that comes with every sentence.
It feels a little strange but also exciting to walk through the oceanarium holding hands. It’s such a small, innocent pleasure, a sweet piece ofnormallife, and somehow it means more to me than I ever expected.
People walk by us, and they probably regard us as a couple, and it’s… just cute!
I blush and occasionally glance at the other omegas to make sure they see what a hot alpha I’ve snagged.
We step into the long tunnel, and the view is breathtaking. Schools of fish swirl around us, feeding on the reefs, their colors and shapes hypnotic. Light cuts down through the surface of the water in long, rippling beams, and for a while I just stare, captivated.
Inside me there’s this conflict, a pull between wanting a huge aquarium of my own and the guilt of knowing the fish inside wouldn’t be free. They’d be trapped in a small space, maybe safe but still contained.
We reach a glass wall where a stunning school of golden and silver fish glides past. I lift my free hand and press it against the glass. A few of them swim closer, curious, as if expecting food,or maybe just drawn to movement. I watch their shimmering bodies, and out of the corner of my eye I notice Snow watching me.
Slowly I turn toward him. Our eyes meet, and the silence stretches, not awkward but strangely exciting.
Snow's eyes shift over my face.
