Page 78 of The Book Reader
“Maddie?”
Her eyes open for a second, she smiles lightly at me, then the spell drops fully, and I’m released. “Maddie?” I scramble over to her on my knees and pull her into my arms. “Baby? My Rose?”
My hand lifts to wipe the spit from her face and her hair so I can look into her eyes; they’re not glowing anymore, they’re just staring off into space, a space that I’m not in. “No, no, no, no.”
I scream, and the windows in the house burst out of their frames, shattering from the force of it and my pain—I’ve lost her again. “We didn’t have enough time, Maddie. I wanted to show you so much.” I lower my head as I bring her to my chest, rocking her as I sob.
I don’t know how long I stayed with her in my arms, suns and moons came and went, but I refused to let her go.
“Gaelan?” Ari’s soft voice pulls me out of my memory, the air in my lungs rushing in and out fast as I try to push past the pain I feel caging my heart.
Ari lifts her hand; her soft fingers wipe the tears I didn’t know were escaping my eyes. “Are you okay?” She asks me, her voice so full of concern.
Not trusting myself to speak without my voice cracking with my remembered devastation, I lower as I pull her onto my lap and place my lips hard to her, kissing her deeply with all the loveI have for her. She gasps against my mouth, allowing me to slip my tongue into her mouth. Kissing her harder.
She is back; I pray to all the gods in heaven and hell that I don’t have to live through losing her again.
Each time I lose a little of myself, I start to wonder how much I have left inside.
Chapter 29
ARIANNA - PRESENT DAY
It’s been a week since Gaelan and I came back from the woods. We came straight to the bedroom and we didn’t leave it for three days; we talked, had lots of sex, and at one point, Gaelan even had the chef bring food to the door for us. On the fourth day, Gaelan had meetings to attend, so I was left to explore the castle.
I found his office, which was through a door next to our bed, and I’m currently sitting with the box of letters from my house between my legs. Rex is cuddled up next to me—for a hell-hound, he’s surprisingly very gentle. Gaelan told me not to be fooled by it, though; he can crush a human head with one bite, and his favorite snack is a hand—apparently, he loves the fingers. I look down at Rex and scratch his head. “Why fingers?”
He whines and licks my face.
“You know what? You do you. Enjoy, maybe after this we can go and find you a hand.” He licks my face again before flopping back down to lie next to me.
“Right,” I sigh and pull open the box. I reach in and pull out a stack of letters and papers. I pick up the first one; it’s addressedto me and unopened. Shrugging, I open it and smile when a ring falls out.
To my beautiful Rose,
I am writing you this letter because I miss you so fucking much, and I have no idea what to do with that feeling.
It’s been two months since she took you from me again. I promised myself that I would do better this time, that I would just wait for you to return, but last time it took a hundred years. Baby, I don’t think I can wait that long again.
I miss your smiles; the way you would kiss me goodnight, the little notes you would leave me all over the house, I miss the way everything you touched smelled like roses. The way you would always try to make me laugh when I was having a bad day.
I miss everything about you.
I killed them all for you, the men that touched you when they shouldn’t have, and I went to the underworld after I buried you. I killed them, their families, and anyone who so much as looked at me that day.
I don’t regret it
I’m in a dark place, Maddie, and I don’t know how to get out of it.
Come home to me.
I need you.
I love you so fucking much it hurts.
I don’t have anywhere to send this letter; you will never get to read it.
But if by some miracle you do.
