Page 42 of The Night Before Christmas
‘See you tomorrow then.’
‘Okay.’
Ooh. Fireworks.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Her stomach was doingsomersaults by the time 11am came the next day.
It had been fizzing so much in anticipation, in fact, that Felicity hadn’t been able to face any breakfast and now she was empty and hungry and excited and a bit tired from her evening shift, all in equal measure.
After an unnecessary amount of deliberation given the size of her wardrobe, she had settled on her favourite ‘casual’ outfit – her best jeans and her trusty Joules floral shirt that was now mercifully shaving-foam free. For a fleeting moment she had even contemplated wearing some smart shoes but it was only fleeting; she quickly saw sense and threw on her familiar trainers. They were comforting, somehow. Safe. She didn’t want to look too eager, that was the thing. It still wasn’t an official date, was it? Their status right now was ‘unclear’. Felicity knew enough to know these were crucial times.Be casual. Act cool. Wear the trainers.Still, when the time came, she stood shyly outside the centre, cursing her choices and praying Andrea wouldn’t come out and interrogate her even though she must have known she was there.
Her phone buzzed.
Bex: Darling, are you free today? I’ve got something to tell you. Amazing gossip. Get it while it’s hot!
I’ll reply later, thought Felicity, after a couple of minutes of trying and failing to concentrate successfully on composing a simple text.
She waited. She looked up and down the road. She looked again.
She checked her watch. 11.15. That was cruel, she thought. The time had dragged so slowly that morning and now it was flying past. ‘Slow down,’ she told her watch. ‘I want to enjoy this day.’
Hang on. 11.15?
And then from nowhere a familiar bad feeling flew down and lodged itself in her chest. The fizzing in her stomach turned to full-on nausea. He had been late before, of course, but this time it was different somehow. This had been a proper arrangement, after all, and something felt… off. She began to pace backwards and forwards, just for something to do.
Please come. Please come. Please come.
At 11.30, Andrea popped her head out from behind the door. She looked grave and Felicity stifled a sob and then tutted at herself. It was fine. Everything was fine.
‘James has been held up,’ said Andrea, brusquely. ‘He said he’s sorry and he’ll text you later. Sorry, love. Do you want to come in for a cuppa?’
Felicity shook her head, already turning away and waving a hand vaguely so Andrea wouldn’t see the tears rolling down her cheeks.He could have called me himself.
Her phone buzzed again as she walked slowly back to her flat.
Bex: We could do lunch?
She sighed and quickly tapped out a response.
Sorry, bit busy today, but soon, I promise. F x
And then, another buzz.
Heart in mouth time.
James: I’m so sorry, something came up. See you soon though I hope. PM x
Felicity let herself in, slipped off her shoes, climbed onto her bed and lay back despondently, feeling like an idiot for letting herself get so excited.
Maybe he’s had a better offer.
Felicity lay there for some time.
So much time, in fact, that she was getting really cold, but she couldn’t be bothered to get under the duvet. It just seemed like too much effort. She could picture the action she’d need to do. It was so smooth when she ran it through in her head, like a movie ninja or crazy stunt woman – just one swift roll to the left, right hand pulls duvet out from under her body and then a smooth movement back to the right, with the duvet now in place above her, all warm and cosy. It was simple. It was the work of moments. But, somehow, she just couldn’t summon the energy to actually do it. Plus, there was the fact that she’d probably end up on the floor in a heap.
She just shivered instead.
