Page 75 of The Night Before Christmas
After the longest five seconds in the history of time, Adam blinked once, and the relief was so overwhelming that Felicity dropped to her knees on the floor next to him and started sobbing uncontrollably. She grabbed his arm and felt for a pulse. It was slow and shallow, but it was there. His brown eyes were wide and staring into the distance, his pupils looked enormous, and he seemed to be struggling to breathe. Felicity could feel the panic rising in her own chest; somewhere that seemed very far away she could hear Andrea on the phone – loud this time – giving directions to the ambulance – and she told herself to stay calm.Focus.
Adam was scarily pale. Grey, even. As she watched in horror, he started clawing at his chest.
‘Adam, can you hear me?’ said Felicity, tears rolling down her cheeks. ‘I’m so sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.’
When the paramedics arrived, they had to prise her away from him.
He was alive.
That was something.
It had been dicey in the ambulance. The female paramedic riding in the back with them was deep in concentration for the whole journey and never took her eyes from the machines Adam was strapped to. Felicity hadn’t dared speak, she just held Adam’s hand and prayed silently that she hadn’t killed him.Bloody typical, that would be,she thought, if I’ve killed him by saying what I really felt about something for the first time in my life.For Pete’s sake.
When they arrived at the hospital, Adam was whisked away through two sets of swing doors and Felicity spent an excruciating few hours pacing the floor of the waiting room, feeling weighed down by her own guilt and an overwhelming need to comfort eat. She walked backwards and forwards, drinking water from the dispenser and eyeing up the chocolate bars in the vending machine.Exactly how many Mars bars is too many Mars bars? That’s the question…
At 6pm, a doctor finally came to update her. He was a very tall, slim man with glasses, who looked as if he’d had a rough day.
‘He’s alive.’
Felicity nodded, tears springing to her eyes without warning.
‘He’s doing okay, and it’s all thanks to you.’
‘I’m not sure about that,’ said Felicity, shifting uncomfortably.
‘I’m serious, are you a first aider? You must be. It was your fast response, calling the ambulance so quickly in the first place and keeping him awake, which probably saved his life. I mean that. Really, well done.’
Felicity’s stomach had tied itself into a knot by this point. Um.That’s not exactly the whole story.
‘I’m not sure I was that much help, actually…’ she started to say.
‘You were, trust me. Now, the thing is, although he’s doing okay, we don’t know exactly what happened, so we’ll need to run some more tests tomorrow. He’s stable for the moment so I suggest you go home and get some sleep while you can. You’ve been through a serious trauma today, too.’
Felicity nodded, but she knew she couldn’t possibly leave. Instead, as soon as the doctor left, she went outside and rang James.
‘I know it’s spectacularly awkward and I know I don’t have the right to ask you for anything, especially when it comes to Adam… but…’
‘I’m on my way,’ said James, when he managed to gather what was going on between sniffs.
He arrived within the hour and wrapped her up tightly in his arms while Felicity sobbed and snotted all over his shoulder.
Mr Fix-it that he was, James had offered to pay for a hotel just down the road so Felicity could get some sleep but still be near the hospital, but she declined. Although she really wanted to run away and hide under a duvet, she couldn’t bear the thought of leaving Adam on his own and they had no idea who to call. Felicity wasn’t in touch with Adam’s family anymore, and only God knew if he was still in contact with this Tabitha person. Or whoever it was he’d cheated on her with. Or whatever other woman might have been lurking around the edges of his life these days. A quick nosey on his Facebook profile had left them none the wiser, so instead, they settled in as best they could in the waiting room. James had even brought snacks and a change of clothes for Felicity, procured from somewhere or other on his way. In jollier circumstances, she would have been mercilessly mocking his appalling taste in women’s clothes or asking whether he’d picked up any Percy Pigs. (He had, of course.)
‘Jaaaaaaaaaames,’ said Felicity, later that night, shifting position where she was curled up on the uncomfortable metalbench. The dodgy velour tracksuit he’d bought her – from what she could only assume was a low-price supermarket – was chafing in some awkward places.
‘Hmmm?’ said James, who had been nodding off next to her with his head leaning on his hand.
‘Is it all my fault?’
‘For the millionth time, I’m sure it wasn’t. What did you say to him? I mean… I’m just asking. I’m not suggesting anything.’
‘I blew my top. I have no idea why. It just suddenly all came out, all the anger I’ve been burying for so long. All the stuff about Bex, all of it.’
‘I’m sure you weren’t that bad. You can’t have been… I mean, you never lose your temper.’
‘You weren’t there. It was seriously bad. I feel awful now.’
James patted her leg supportively while Felicity chewed her lip and tried to relax. His presence was definitely a comfort even if the nearness of him so late at night was also rather distracting despite the circumstances.
