Page 59 of The Night Before Christmas
‘Fine. Yes, I deserved it. I deserve a whole lot more than that, probably. It’s just, when I fall for someone, I fall hard. What can I say?’
Felicity chose to ignore this.
‘Tell me one thing,’ said Felicity. ‘This woman, you’ve apparently been with for the last… however long it’s been. The one you were cheating on me with.’
‘Tabitha.’
‘Whatever. What happened to her? I mean, how come you broke up?’
He put his face in his hands, revealing a very expensive-looking watch on one wrist. Felicity was determined not to show him any sympathy. The watch helped.
After what felt like an eternity, while Felicity got more and more cross that he was ruining her break with this emotional shambles, he spoke through his fingers.
‘Don’t be mad,’ he whispered.
‘Oh my God.’
‘I cheated on her too,’ he said, the words tumbling out of him. ‘I honestly don’t know what’s wrong with me. I knew things weren’t right and I should just talk to her but instead I got drunk and met this girl in a bar and… well, you don’t need to know the details.’
‘Definitely not. I can’t believe this. What the helliswrong with you?’
‘I don’t know. Honestly. I have no idea.’
‘And you were engaged.’
‘Yes, we were engaged. God, I’m such a mess.’
He looked up at her, his dark eyebrows knitted together.
Shesowanted to help him. She thought back over the years to all the times she had helped him, had made him feel good about himself when he was low, had stroked his ego.
I am so not going there again. I just can’t.
‘Adam, look, I know I like to rescue things and I thinkyouthink I’m going to rescue you in some way. That I’m the person who can prevent you from ending up alone. Because of course that’s what you’re afraid of. I can’t believe I haven’t seen it before.’
Adam visibly winced, as if he’d been struck.
‘Yes, I know that’s what this is all about. I’m not as dumb as you think. I know, we were each other’s first love and everything that comes with that. And I always thought you were someone I could trust completely. But now? It’s totally different now.’ She was shaking with the force of her own words, her own truth.
‘As much as anything else, you tried to fob me off with a ring you bought for someone else. Don’t you realise that’s verging on sociopathic? It’s just not normal.’ A tear rolled down her cheek and she wiped it away with the back of her hand. ‘And the thing is. I deserve better.’
‘You’re right, you’re right, of course.’ He nodded. ‘But I swear, the only time I’ve ever functioned properly in my entire life… was when I was with you.’
‘Well, now you’ll have to find someone else who makes you feel like that. I’m sure you won’t have any trouble. Girls seem to flock to you, after all.’
That last bit sounded more jealous than she had intended it to.
She stood up, her chair making a grotesquely noisy sound on the gravel, causing several heads to turn their way.
Adam reached for her hand again but she pulled it away.
‘Wait. Can’t I see you, sometimes, maybe? Just as friends? I miss you, Fliss. We’ve been through so much.’
‘I don’t think that’s a good idea, do you?’
‘Will you at least think about it?’
She sighed. ‘I’ll think about it.’
