Page 7 of Clean Hack
Tonight I was bored. It happened every now and then. Oh, and it never led anywhere good.
This was when I usually watched things I really shouldn’t and became that creepy pervert, even though I didn’t get off to it. It was more for entertainment purposes.
I found one of the Steel Paragon men in his room with one of the club girls. I’d never met the guy but I could tell he was as charming as they came. He had that smile, you know that one, the right amount of tilt and teeth that made you believe whatever words he was slinging your way. I imagined he used the wordbabyanddoll faceloosely, among others. He was smooth and to an outsider that wasn’t even in the same state as he was, I could tell instantly.
Bocca was right up there with me as far as skills went. Only, I was a little better. Obviously, because I was watching him and he didn’t have one fucking clue. He hadn’t found me out for years. He made it too easy for me to hack his system. Sometimes I pictured what his reaction would be when he found out that it was his love of cheek-exposing undies that brought him down. That man sure was specific about what covered his junk. And I had been witness to him modeling those undies for many people. It was hard not to laugh at it every single time. But also, he pulled it off quite well. It had to be the tight ass and rippling back muscles.
I was getting off track.
While I did have sound to what went on in his room, I often turned it off at times like this. I didn’t need to hear the terribly overdone moans that came from whatever girl he’d brought into his room.
She was down on her knees and this was where the fun really started.
“That’s right, baby. You know you like that dick.”
Yep, I made my own script up. And I did drop a few octaves for his part. As well as made a high, whiny pitch for hers.
I wasn’t exactly proud of it, but I had to find my entertainment somewhere. Also, my life wasn’t that great and it gave me the break I needed. Sure, I could have found some mindless show to watch. I could have fallen into some dark binge watching hole. Or I could have ordered some books and had them in my hands in two days for the down times. But, let me be real, this was so much better. It really helped me to stretch my imagination, just as good as reading a book. Right?
“Oh, I just love your cock. It’s so big and hard. Yeah, just like that, cram it down my throat.”
The tears and snot never really did it for me. I wasn’t one for dick choking. Granted, it had been a damn long time since I’d had one in my mouth, but still, never really liked that feeling like I had to hold back the vomit from erupting.
This went on for a while. It was enough to make me laugh and get my mind off of everything for a bit. Watching him fuck her didn’t do anything for me. I didn’t have the urge to open my trunk and dig for the right vibrator that would make me go off like a rocket in two point five seconds. I didn’t even need to change my panties.
Maybe I’d been alone for too long. I was starting to question how weird I was. But I guessed it didn’t matter as long as no one knew about it. And I couldn’t imagine anyone would as long as I kept it locked up inside.
Much like most people, they used sex for all kinds of things. What I’d learned was that it very rarely had anything to do with feelings. And they never seemed to mind the whole sharing thing. I wasn’t a prude, but I couldn’t imagine being with the same person that all of my friends had been with. I wondered if they swapped stories after and what that might sound like.
‘Yeah, got there before you tonight, dude.’
‘Fuck, I could tell, bro. Her pussy was so loose that I had to fuck her ass just to come.’
This, of course, would be followed by high-fives and laughing.
Okay, I knew they didn’t really talk all dude-bro fraternity like, but for some reason that was how they sounded in my head. Maybe it made them seem less intimidating. Or it could have been that they kind of had the maturity of a frat boy. At least from the outside.
“Oh, my God. I’m fucking losing it,” I muttered to the empty room.
Times like this I missed the past. I missed when things were more…simple. When I was living in a house with more rooms than three people needed. On a street where no one so much as went one mile over the speed limit. In a neighborhood where kids could play in the street until after dark without adult supervision.
Back when sneaking in and out of my room and running off to do things I hoped my parents never found out about was only as dangerous as I wanted it to be.
One night.
One single thing.
Had changed that safety net forever.
And I was the only one around that knew it. Kids still played in the street. Everyone still left their doors unlocked during the day. People still went to work without so much as a shiver of fear.
All the while, Allison was gone. Had been taken. Evil had come into our world and I was the only one that knew. Well, and her father, but he was evil from the beginning so I didn’t count him.
The days grew longer for me and I felt like I couldn’t tell a soul. The police questioned me and told me that I shouldn’t make up such things. Then they proceeded to tell me exactly how much they knew about me and how I couldn’t be considered ‘credible’ at all. They looked at me as though I were a common delinquent. Which, maybe I couldn’t argue with, but at the same time, I didn’t really do much beyond what most teenagers my age were doing. Sure, I snuck out. I partied. I had random sex in the backseat of cars and strange bedrooms. I drank, but never to the point of being so drunk I didn’t have my wits about me. And I never, fucking ever, did drugs. So, all in all, I didn’t think I was that bad. But it didn’t matter, even then I could tell that no matter how hard I screamed, no one would believe me. I wondered for a long time, if there was even anything I could have done to change the outcome. That if I had been a so-called good girl, would it have made a difference? They wouldn’t have listened to me because even before I walked into that police station and demanded to talk to someone, the cover-up had already been handled.
That night, the last time I’d laid eyes on Allison, had been the night I felt the most useless ever. But what made it worse was that I continued to feel that way, even up until this day. I couldn’t help in any way. I couldn’t have stopped it that night. I couldn’t get people to see that she had been taken. And now, I couldn’t find the man responsible for it all. I couldn’t even track down one lead that would help me save her. Which, I knew I would because I refused to believe that she was gone.
I needed a pizza.
Strange thought, I know. But pizza meant, pizza guy to deliver it. Which meant that I would have three minutes of human interaction and not feel like such a freak. Plus, I was hungry. That was just as good of an excuse as any.
Or I could have called Nadya. That was probably the better choice. Because she made me feel normal in a strange way. She didn’t judge me. It probably helped that I didn’t do the same to her. We kept the whole work talk pretty much to nil. I knew what she did and she knew enough about me to know that I could get myself into a lot of trouble if I were ever caught. That was enough for both of us. There were times that line got crossed only because I liked to watch her targets like she did. I helped her get and set up her surveillance equipment, well in the way that she placed the cameras and I linked everything together from my magnificent chair. I got her up and running and therefore had access to the same things she was able to see.
And then I would get curious and do research on her targets once I was able to get a face. I’d never share what I found out because that wasn’t what she wanted. She never asked, so I wasn’t sure what I’d do when that day came. Or worse, the day that the contract she took was to take out someone that didn’t have evil clouding their shadow.
I couldn’t think about that. I had to stay focused and believe that she knew what she was doing. It wasn’t my life, it wasn’t my soul that I had to watch out for. I didn’t have to live with the things that she did. Maybe that was the coward's way of looking at it, but that was the way it had to be. I couldn’t even imagine living with all of that on my head.
That shit would blow up in my face one day, I just had a feeling.
