Page 2 of Ky
“Oooh, eager boy.” She bit her lip and I imagined that she thought it was sexy. Her hand went to my pants and I let her work them down my legs. “So big.”
Then she attempted to stuff all of me down her throat. Her mouth was warm and wet, but that was about it. I wasn’t looking for fireworks and rainbows, but a little tingle in my balls would have been fucking nice. The harder I tried to get into it, the softer my dick fell.
Fuck!
“You alright, baby?” she asked, her hand stroking my cock trying to bring it back to life.
“Yeah, just give me a minute,” I said in an angry, frustrated tone. I screwed my eyes closed tight and worked myself back and forth in her hand.
Images danced in my mind but I wouldn’t admit them to anyone, possibly not even myself.
Her mouth wrapped around me again and I gripped the hair at the top of her head, imagining the longs strands were much shorter. I drowned out her fake moans with my own grunts. Yeah, it was fucked up, but as my balls began to tingle and tighten, I knew there was no going back.
“That’s it,” I said, sadly not talking to blondie in front of me. “Take my cock. Swallow me down that tight throat.”
I came, grunting and biting down hard on my bottom lip. There was a name at the tip of my tongue, begging to be screamed out. Only, it wasn’t the one of the chick currently lapping up the last of my cum that had dribbled down her chin.
“Well, that was fun,” she said after a long moment of dead silence. The slight aggravation in her tone wasn’t missed by me.
“Yeah,” I said, scratching the back of my neck. “Thanks?” I gave her a little shrug.
It was a shitty thing to say. And as I held open the door as a blatant attempt to let her know this whole thing was done and over, I knew it was a fucked up thing to do.
I was sure that if I tried hard enough I could get it up for what could have been next, but that would have come at a horrible cost. I already felt crappy enough about what I’d just done and I didn’t need to dive further into that dark hole.
“Okay, whatever,” she said as she hurried to put on her clothes then brushed past me and out of sight.
I shut the door and breathed a strange sigh of relief.
What the fuck just happened?
The answer to that question was not one I wanted to search out. No. There wasn’t even a tiny part of me that wanted to explain to myself what was going on with me. So I grabbed a beer from my fridge and downed in as fast as possible. I needed the buzz tonight to make me forget and to help me sleep.
I paced my tiny room. Everything here was mine. I’d made my way in life, found my place, and I wasn’t ready to shake that foundation even a little. Even if I entertained the ideas and feelings that had tried to overtake my head the last couple of months, I had no clue how that would affect things—change things. That right there said something that I hated. It made me think that I didn’t know my brothers as well as I should have. Because if I did give in to whatever was going on with me, I wasn’t sure if they’d still accept me.
The uncertainty of that gutted me and left me gasping for air. I could lose all of this. My place. My job. My club. All the things that I loved and respected. I didn’t want to let it go just yet, and at the same time, I wasn’t sure if I wanted to be a part of something that had that kind of bigotry attached to it.
I’d been there before. I’d seen what the hate and fear could do. And I’d promised myself ten years ago, that I would never be apart of something that vengeful ever again. With that said, it felt completely different when it was your own skin and feelings that you were trying to protect.
I moved to the window and slid back the curtain with my pointer finger. I felt like a creep peeking out at my brothers like that, but I had to see them as an outsider. Just for a second, I wondered what I could have been missing. Maybe it was nothing.
These guys were solid. They’d been there for me and I’d done the same for them. I’d helped them. Partied with them. Killed with them. There was a bond there that was stronger than anything that could ever be explained.
My eyes caught on the chick that had fled my room not even half an hour ago. Her body pressed tight against Charming’s and it was clear that she had been using me just as much as I was her. The little bit of guilt that I had dissolved away and I couldn’t care less about what I’d done.
I flopped down in the middle of my bed. Alone, I drifted off to the muffled sounds of the ongoing party. The sounds that had started to feel like home. The very same ones that I fell asleep to nearly every night.
