Page 61 of Knight
CHAPTER TWENTY-FIVE
Knight
I love you.
Yes, those words had slipped from my lips. I should have been shocked, but I wasn’t. I did love her, I think I always had.
She hadn’t said it back to me. Then again, I did my best to not give her the opportunity to do so. I had this feeling in my gut that if she didn’t say it back my heart might shatter, but at the same time, I didn’t want her to say them just because I had. So, I didn’t even give her a chance. Did it make any kind of logical sense? No. But I think it was what we both needed at the time.
The hours counted down almost too fast for me to keep up. The day had been a busy one because I made sure it was that way. If I was constantly doing something then I wouldn’t have time to think about the fact that I’d be facing Brass soon.
Then, it was actually time to face him.
And the club meeting went on and on and fucking on.
I tried to keep the nervous energy hidden but I just couldn’t stop my leg from bouncing. I only hoped that no one noticed. The last thing I wanted to do was let on how uneasy I felt or come off seeming like I was bored and disrespectful.
This was a big meeting. Setting up runs for the next few batches of shipments that we would hand off to Gray Fort. Brass talked about some new contacts that he was setting up with Cal. If luck had it, we would be able to pull back with the long runs for the shipment hand-offs. Maybe we’d even get to a point we wouldn’t have to do them at all. We would just handle the intake here and be done with it. But that was reaching at this point. I knew we had a long way to go.
With nothing left to bring to the table, the meeting wrapped up. I met Brass’ eyes and held his gaze, not letting anything show. His eyes narrowed for a split second before he gave me a firm nod as if he understood the unsaid request.
“Iron,” Brass said catching my new prez’s attention. “You mind if we use this room for a bit?”
Iron looked back and forth between Brass and me for a moment. Luckily, everyone else had filed out and no one was around to witness the mess that might have been in the near future.
“Need me to stay?” Iron asked crossing his arms over his chest.
“Nah, have a feeling this is a personal matter.” If I wasn’t mistaken there was a hint of laughter in his voice. I wanted to relax and feel a tiny sense of relief at that, but I knew better.
“Alright. See you down there,” Iron said with a nod. “No blood on my table.” He left with the half-joking warning, closing the door partially on his way out.
I started to open my mouth to say something but abruptly stopped when he held up his hand.
“No, I’m going first,” he stated and I knew better than to argue. “I know I put you in a tough spot with Gwen. But I want you to know that I trust no one more than you when it comes to her. I get that you two haven’t seen each other in a while, and I’m a smart enough man to catch on to the fact that something happened to you guys back when.”
His fingers tapped on the table and for a long moment, there was a pause of silence.
“She’s been…lost for a long time, Knight. Even before she went to California.” His eyes glazed over as he talked. I could see a deep-rooted sadness there and I had no doubts that it was because this was something he couldn’t fix or even had a clue how to. “You had your reasons for…whatever it was that happened…I’m sure. Just as I’m sure you distanced yourself because you thought it was what was best for her.”
“Brass,” I said with all intentions of explaining everything and clearing the air.
“No,” he said with a shake of his head. Clearly, I wasn’t to speak until he got out all he needed to. “She’s happy here. I can hear it in her voice when she calls me. She’s making a life here. That’s all I’ve ever wanted for her was to feel like she found her place in life on her own. Whether that be back home staying with the club, or somewhere apart from it. Knight, she’sreallyhappy here. Don’t ruin it for her, is all I ask.”
“Sir,” I said shocking the shit out of both of us. He eyed me knowing that whatever I had to say next I was dead serious about. “I have no intentions to. I want to make a lifewithher, and she wants the same thing. All these years…I’ve felt incomplete. Now that she’s let me in again, I know that I would do anything and everything to keep it that way.”
“So what are you saying, Knight?” his tone was gruff, giving me no indication how he was taking what I was trying to tell him.
“I love Gwen. Simply put. She’s everything to me. Really, she always has been, I just managed to fuck it up somehow.” I felt shame and regret for the past, but I couldn’t help but feel like maybe this was the way it was supposed to happen.
“You’ve been shaking in your boots because you love my daughter?” he asked letting out a huge laugh that echoed off the walls like it was the funniest joke he’d ever heard.
“Yeah. I mean, I thought you wouldn’t be happy with her being with one of us. Ya know?” I cocked a brow in confusion.
“You’re not just anyone, Knight. You should know that. Love you like a son and years ago, I maybe had hoped it would turn out this way. But I let go of that when you hightailed it out of Gray Fort and didn’t look back.”
“Biggest mistake of my life,” I admitted without hesitation as I blew out a long breath. This was going better than I’d hoped. I almost couldn’t believe it, but I was fucking grateful for it as well.
“Don’t fuck it up again. I—”
