Page 12 of Axe
A chill ran through my spine just thinking about his position. I didn’t want to imagine the things that he had to do as an Enforcer, the things that he had to see.
Instead of letting my head drive itself in that direction, I focused on Neiryn and making sure he wasn’t shoving too much into his mouth at once.
“Dink,” my little boy said, breaking the crazy tension and saving me from having to answer. I went to stand up, holding him close as I did, but Axe shot up out of his seat before I could.
“I’ll get it. What…uh, does he drink?” he asked, almost looking lost at what to do.
“There is some juice on the counter, and a clean sippy cup in the bag next to the couch.”
My eyes followed his every movement. His jeans were worn and looked soft. They hung low on his hips and when he bent over to retrieve the cup, his shirt slipped up and I could see the black band of his underwear.
I licked my bottom lip without even realizing it. Brand cleared his throat, drawing my attention to him. He leaned back against the wall, his slice completely gone now. He smirked when my eyes met his, letting me know that what had just happened hadn’t gone unseen.
Damn.
I needed to get myself together. I couldn’t let these guys rattle me. But that was easier said than done, because clearly, Axe was shaking me in a way I would never have expected. The worst thing was, I couldn’t help but call attention to it.
Axe came back and slid the cup across the table. Neiryn reached for it and quickly tipped it back. He let out a refreshing sound when he was done and I couldn’t help but smile at how cute he could be. If I wasn’t mistaken, Axe’s lips twitched a bit but I wouldn’t let myself believe it was because he was thinking the same thing I was about my boy.
“Tank ah,” Neiryn said looking at Axe.
“You’re welcome, Lil man,” Axe said with a slight nod to him.
This was the most awkward meal I think I’d ever had, and that was saying something. The pizza was growing cold in front of me, but the hunger I’d had earlier was suddenly gone. My stomach was in knots and the thought of putting food in it left me feeling sick.
Neiryn ate and the room was silent except for the little humming noises he made when he chewed. After he was done I took him to the kitchen and cleaned him up, all the while there was Axe making a point to stand in the doorway, watching me with a hawk’s eye.
I knew I couldn’t hide things from him much longer. He’d made his intentions known and it was a matter of time before he got tired of my silence. I knew I was a terrible liar and I only hoped I could hold it together long enough to give him the tip of the iceberg. I just needed to feed him enough information to satisfy him and keep my cover at the same time.
But there was something about his gaze that made me want to crack completely. Made me want to break down, tell him everything, and hope that he would hold me in the end.
Which was crazy! And I knew it. This guy seemed like he wasn’t the comforting type. Even if I ever entertained the idea of finding someone to spend my life with, Axe was the furthest thing from who that person should be.
The only excuse I could come up with was that I was so fucked up that I had no idea whatgoodwas anymore—what right was. The more I thought about it, the more I felt a sinking feeling in my gut.
Maybe I wouldn’t make it out of this normal in the end. But then again, I had no idea what normal was anymore.
