Page 69 of Tank
“Yep, I get it,” he mumbled, moving up behind me then around me to open the door. “Come in.”
The room looked the same as the last time I’d been standing in it. I wasn’t sure why I expected it to be any different, but something in me hoped that all of this wasn’t real. That I was in some sort of weird dreamland and I kept looking around for that one thing that was out of place that was the clue to it being all wrong. But I didn’t find it and it made me question if maybe I wasn’t right where I needed to be.
“All clear,” Grant called out, moving to sit on the edge of the couch, his eyes glued to my face like he was trying to read me.
“What was it—oh!” Darcy said as she came out of the hall where I presumed she had been hunkered down with Noah’s son. Her eyes darted over my shoulder then around the room.
“He didn’t come with me,” I said knowing she was looking for Noah. Her shoulders slumped a bit but she still held her head high.
“Why are you here?” she asked, her eyes narrowing at me a bit. I liked her, she seemed like she had a good sized set of balls on her. She didn’t know Jack about me and yet she didn’t let that stop her.
“To be honest,” I said slow and controlled, “I have no idea.” I needed to figure some things out and apparently, this is where my brain thought I should do it. But I had a feeling if I said that then I would seem a bit crazy.
“Aunt Darcy, can we play a game now?” A tiny voice called from down the hall as fast footfalls brought him closer to the room.
My heart raced and my body locked in a frozen state. The thing that hit me the most was not knowing exactly what I was feeling on the inside.
Swallowing down the lump in my throat as gracefully as I could, I did my best to prepare myself to see the boy for the first time. Even though, I felt like I already knew him it was all so surreal. The sharp intake of breath that came from me couldn’t be hidden and as his steel gray eyes, that seemed so familiar only smaller, looked up to me, and a fucking tear ran down my cheek.
“Hi,” he said, flashing me a wide smile and waving his hand frantically in the air beside his head.
“Hello,” I croaked out weirdly choked up by strange emotions.
He was the spitting image of Noah. His long hair held golden, honey highlights and the big curls were long enough to tuck behind his ears. His little frame was very solid and not in a way that suggested he was fed too many pancakes. It was just the way he was built. Just like his dad. Though, Noah clearly had the defined muscles of a man. One who I had no doubt worked on those muscles daily before all went to shit in his life.
“I’m Logan. But everyone likes to call me Grass ‘cause I don’t listen and I get in trouble a lot,” he said with a tiny shrug like he wasn’t even fazed by it. I choked out a tiny laugh and that made him smile bigger. “You’re pretty. I like your eyes,” he added, taking me by surprise.
“Thank you,” I said feeling a smile tip up on my lips. “I like your hair.” I had no idea why I’d said that. I was so bad at this—dealing with a kid. I didn’t have the first clue what I should say or do.
“Thanks! My grandma always says I got my dad’s unruly hair,” he said like he was proud of that fact.
“You do.” The words rushed passed my lips before I could even stop them. To that, his little eyes lit up and my heart fucking shattered.
“You know my dad? I miss him. I know he’s probably sad being away from me, but Aunt Darcy says we have to stay here for a little while. But it’s been more than a little while. It’s been forever.” All the words rushed out of his mouth all at once it seemed and it was the most adorable thing. Sadness pulled at his features the more he went on.
It was obvious the boy was at a loss in life without his dad as Noah was without him. I found myself crouching to his level, his feet shuffled forward like he was waiting for me to tell him a secret.
“Your dad misses you, buddy. He talks about you all the time.”
“He does?”
“Yes,” I nodded. “So much so, that I feel like I already know you. And he wants nothing more than to be here with you, but he has to take care of a few things before he can bring you home.” I said feeling this strange need to not lie to him but protect him at the same time. I looked up to Darcy, searching her face for any signs that I was overstepping.
The tears welled in her eyes as she gave me a tiny nod like I was doing a good job. I had no idea why her approval meant so much to me, but strangely it warmed my heart to know.
