Page 59 of Diesel
“No!” Diesel roared. “You’ll never replace Ellie. No one can. Don’t think for a fuckin’ second that you would even come close. I’ll kill you myself if you hurt her.”
“Fine,” she replied, sounding almost bored. She tossed Reagan away and her body fell to the ground like a limp ragdoll. Then Tammy turned her gun on Diesel. She took three steps towards him, the clicking of her heels on the floor echoing loudly in the silent room. “If I can’t have you, then no one will.” She cocked her gun and my heart sped up.
“Aw, shit. Naw,” one of the thugs said from across the room. But it didn’t faze Tammy.
Diesel’s eyes shot to me and I could see everything so clearly. I read him like an open book. He was sorry. He was sad. And he was regretful. I couldn’t let this be the end. I needed him. No. I wanted him. I wanted my lifewithhim and our baby.
Something inside me snapped. Before my brain could catch up with my actions, I was moving forward and grabbing a gun off of the table. It was Diesel’s. I had been there long enough to recognize each of their guns. They were as different as their personalities. The different metals, handles, and sizes. I knew nothing about guns, therefore I had no idea what each one was. But I knew each one was about as individual as a tattoo to these guys.
An angry fire started in me, burning from the inside and working its way out. Down my arms and fingers, until I found myself holding the gun tightly and raising it towards Tammy.
“You did this to yourself, you fucking psycho cunt! I didn’t do a damn thing to you. You will not take him away from me!” I yelled, my voice tight and cracking.
All the fear and rage boiled to the surface. She had just threatened my life. My child’s life. And then she was ready to take the man I was pretty sure I was in love with away from me. She was going to kill him right in front of me. She had come in and messed with the people who took me in, even when the person I came there for didn’t want me there at the time. The people who showed me love and what it was like to be part of a family. They showed me what it was like to have friends who were selfless. I couldn’t stand by and let it happen. I may not have been aware of what I was doing because all rational thoughts went out the window the second she pointed the gun at Diesel.
Tammy turned to me, a shocked expression on her face, and before she could point her gun at me, I fired.
Her face morphed into some strange expression, the shock mixing with fear and anger. The red spilled out over her abdomen as she brought her hand up to touch it. Her fingers became soaked with the sticky substance. But I didn’t stop there, I fired three more shots, this time hitting her in the chest. The holes making an upside-down triangle over her breast.
Before I could fire again, strong arms came around me. One arm went around my waist, while the other wrenched the gun from the death grip I had on it. Diesel’s familiar scent filled my nose and I wondered how I didn’t even see him move from the other side of the room. Then Axe was there, taking the gun away from Diesel’s hand.
Well, now he shows up.
My brain wasn’t working quite right. The thoughts I had were not normal, or maybe they were too normal.
Tammy’s body hit the floor with a heavythud. I watched her limbs crumple beneath her as she went down. I knew there were sounds around me, I could hear muffled screaming but I couldn’t make out anything. All I could hear was the bloodwhooshingthrough my ears. I could feel Diesel’s chest vibrating against mine and his lips moving against my ear. But I couldn’t make out the sound that followed.
Then it hit me. I didn’t know what shocked me more, the fact that I had just shot and most likely killed someone or the fact that I had just spit out such vile words. The first time I had ever cussed and it was hateful and loud. Not to mention in front of everyone I cared about. But I meant every word of it. And if I were being honest, it felt almost good as it bubbled out of me. I knew the fact that I had shot Tammy should have sent me into more of a shock. The only thing that I could guess was my brain still wasn’t processing right. Only time would tell.
The world came crashing back to me and it was all horribly loud. My ears were ringing and I could hear Cal barking over the sharp noise. He was taking control and I sensed this was not what anyone would have thought would happen. The whole thing was really messed up. My legs were shaking, and if it weren’t for Diesel holding me up, I would have been on the ground.
He crushed my head into his chest, as he turned his body slightly. I could no longer see Tammy’s body on the floor but I knew that image would be forever burned in my mind.I did that.It all felt unreal. I knew I had pulled the trigger, but I didn’t feel like I had. My body was numb and so was my mind.
“Get the fuck outta here,” Cal hollered over all the noise. “If I ever see your fuckin’ faces again, you will be dead men!” His voice was gravelly and tight. “Leave your fuckin’ guns!”
There was a clattering of metal hitting the floor. Then the squeak of sneakers scurrying across the floor in all different direction as each of them tried to find the fastest way out of the building.
That was when the pain hit me.
“Oh!” I screamed as I doubled over to ease the stabbing feeling in my stomach. My eyes moved to focus on the body pouring blood all over the floor.
I did that. Oh, God, I did that!
The pain worsened and dragged me to the ground. Diesel tried his best to hold me up, but I wanted nothing more than to curl up into a ball.
“Baby,” Diesel said, panic heavily laced in his voice.
“No, no, no!” I screamed as Diesel pulled me gently into his lap.
“Shhhh,” he whispered into my ear as he soothingly ran his hand over my hair.
“Fuck! Get her in the car,” Loch barked. “Get her to the hospital!” I wasn’t sure if he was talking about me or Tammy. But I had a feeling there was nothing that could be done for her, and that it was me he was more concerned about anyway.
“I don’t want to lose this baby, Diesel,” I said looking up into his eyes. I could see the pain shining through his icy color. Tears pooled in the corner of his eyes and it broke me a little more. “I know you’re unsure of us and maybe you didn’t want this, but I don’t want to lose her.” I could feel my own hot tears streaming down my face.
Then the world went black.
