Page 21 of Loch
“Keep thinkin’. This place is only going to get bigger. Fewer families movin’ away. And now we seem to have a corner of younger people lookin’ for that off the beaten path kind of town that has charm.” He grunted and it was like he was saying ‘damn youngins these days’. I laugh, because I halfway felt that way, too. “Church tomorrow night. We’ll get everythin’ out of the way.”
I nodded and headed out. I needed to check on things. We did a lot for the town. Something needed to be repaired, we fixed it. If we couldn’t, then we find a way to make it happen. The buildings that the shops were in on Main Street were old. It felt like every week there was something falling apart.
I made my rounds and found out that everything looked good. No one was having any problems and things seemed quiet. I decided to head to the bar, knowing Reagan was off. It was only a few hours ago she slapped me, but it felt like minutes. I couldn’t shake the things she said to me. I couldn’t shake how shitty I felt about the way I made her feel.
I walked in and made my way around the bar. I grabbed a glass and a bottle of Jack then took a seat next to Brandon at the far end. Chris raised an eye brow and I knew he has no idea what was going on. Brandon gave me a pointed look, but like normal, said nothing. I poured and took a quick shot then poured another. Chris took it as a sign he should be elsewhere and made himself scarce.
“I fucked up.” I broke the tension of silence after a few moments. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw Brandon give a few nods while playing with the label on his beer.
“You gonna fix it?” he asked like it was that simple.
“The fuck am I gonna do?” My tone was deep and had an edge. “I can’t do this fuckin’ woman shit.”
It was true. In all my years, I’d never had a girlfriend. I had a feeling even if I had, it wouldn’t have helped me out a damn bit. Reagan was in her own class. Her own fucking orbit. I didn’t think there was anything out there that could prepare a man for her, no matter how good he was. Not that it was a bad thing. I wouldn’t doubt that was the reason that I was drawn to her, the fact that she didn’t lay down and let me run all over her. That woman had a backbone made of steel.
I felt like a damn girl sitting there talking about my damn problems about her, but I was at a loss when it came to her. And for some odd reason, all that mattered was to do the right thing when it came to Reagan. I cared. More than I was ready to admit. And I wished I could’ve gone back and done it all over again. The question was, would I even do it any different? No, probably not. But maybe I would find a better way of going about it.
“Well,” Brandon said, taking in a slow breath. “You want me to tell you what I’d do?”
“Yeah, what the hell am I sittin’ here yappin’ about this shit if I didn’t think you could help me?” I should have been nicer, but Brandon knew me well enough to know that I wasn’t angry at him. He ducked his head a little more trying to hide the smirk on his face.
“I think you went about it all wrong. Look at it from her point of view, and actually be her in that picture. Now, mind you, I don’t know what you did to her while you took her out, but you basically took her away under false pretenses. She probably thought that you wanted to hang out with her. Spend time with her. That’s the way girls think, man.” He paused and I nodded letting him know I was listening. “Then you bring her back and she finds out it was all so you could pull one over on her.”
“That’s not how I see it. That’s not how I meant it.” I took another shot.
“But that’s how she sees it. You used your handsome face to trick her, in a sense. Now she’s all butt hurt and pissed because you went behind her back and got her a new car. You didn’t even bother to get her input on it. You went and did what you usually do, you get shit done. But she doesn’t know you and doesn’t know that you always do things with the best intention. She doesn’t see that you did it ‘cause you care about her.”
“I don’t—” The ‘I’m not stupid, man’ look on Brandon’s face made me stop talking. I took another shot. There was no use in trying to deny that I had a soft spot for her.
“All she sees is the lying and manipulation,” he finished his rant. I sighed, realizing he was right.
At that point, Chris had come back to this side of the bar. I knew he was listening in and I was too stunned at my dumbness to care. I couldn’t believe that was how she saw it and I couldn’t believe that I didn’t know that was how it looked. I hadn’t felt stupid many times in my life, but that moment was one of them. I looked up at Chris waiting for him to weigh in as well. I could’ve used all the help I could get.
“You should fix this. I don’t know all of what happened, but I can tell you she’s pissed.” That was all Chris had to add.
“Well now that I get the problem, how do I fix it?” I asked feeling at a loss still. “Should I just give her the car back? I don’t want her driving that thing around, not that she goes far, but you never know.”
“Then make it safe to drive,” Chris said with a little shrug like it was such an obvious answer. “You don’t have to tell her everything you did to it, only that you made it safer for her.” I looked over to Brandon. He knew I was telling him to go get her damn car back before I even said anything.
“It’s at the shop. Diesel and Tank are working on it. Should be ready in a few days,” Brandon said. I eyed him. Damn kid was smart. Had my back before I even knew I needed it. That was the thing about him, always looking at every angle and always looking ahead. I let out a small laugh.
“Thanks, man,” I said, clapping him on the back. He shot me a wide-eyed look of surprise. He was quick to recover, tossing me a head nod in return.
I had a better outlook on things now that there was a solution. I didn’t even let the fact that my old ass just got schooled by two guys nearly half my age. I crossed my fingers that the plan would work. But knowing the fire I’d seen from Reagan, I had a feeling there was about to be a lot more making up for me to do. The thing was, I didn’t mind. For whatever fucking reason, I wanted to make her happy. I wanted to make her life easier. I wasn’t a good man. But an odd feeling of wanting to lift and carry some of her burdens hit me. It felt like the most important thing I could ever do in life.
The next day I headed to the garage to help out. I wanted to see how it was going with Reagan’s car. I also wanted to work on something to take my mind of the whole thing. I was sure by that point that most of the brothers had heard about what happened. Or at least the part about me buying her a new car. I knew they were wondering why they were fixing up her old piece of junk since I had. No one said anything, though. I was glad. I wasn’t wanting to get into it, anyway.
Four-thirty rolled around and we found a stopping place. We went over to the clubhouse to have a few beers before church started. The mood was light, everyone was relaxed and laughing. That was the way it should always be. However, even in a small town, there are things that can weigh heavy on us, individually and as a whole.
The club girls were sauntering around, trying to find someone that wanted them for the night. None of them even looked at me. Good. I was still pissed at the shit they pulled while I was gone. Tammy, the fucking ring leader of them, was skating on thin ice. She needed to go, but it was going to take more than a few fuck-ups to kick her out. For me, it was a waiting game. Sure, I had been with her on more occasions than I would be happy to admit. I am only a man after all. And as much as I hate to say it, she was damn good for a quick lay. But it didn’t excuse her behavior in the least. She was still an extension of the club. Her behavior reflected on us all. She needed to learn her place.
Cal nodded to me and I stood up and followed him. He sat at the head of the table and I sat at his right. Diesel, Stone, Tank, Bocca, Axe, Seven, and Crow all walked in a few seconds later and took their seats. Cal cleared his throat and started the meeting.
“First things first,” he said. “Ride in two weeks. Leave Wednesday, pick up shipment Thursday mornin’ then head back. We’re gonna to store it here, South boys are gonna come get it that weekend. Talked to the Dogs and they said this shipment is gonna to be lighter. Only need to bring one van. Don’t know why. He wouldn’t get into it. Keep your eyes and ears open. Shit feels shady, fuckin’ get out of there. Hear somethin’ is up, tell me or Loch right away.”
Everyone nodded, understanding. I wondered why he didn’t share that last part with me until now. Something about it didn’t sit right with me. It could have been that he wanted it to seem like it wasn’t a big deal. But I could tell he was a little spooked.
“Loch, Crow, Stone, and Axe go. Take Brandon and Lake, too. Still not sure about Lake yet, we’ll see how he does on this run.” Lake was a young kid. He came to us about four months ago and after a few weeks, we gave him a prospect patch. He was still young and sometimes he messed up. I had faith that he would learn from his mistakes and grow into a roll in the club. Cal waited to see if anyone had anything to say.
