Page 90 of Kings of Lust
‘To help you,’ I reached out a hand to touch him and like a vampire in the night, his darkness pulled me in, crushing my body against his own and merging our lips into the sinfulness of kissing.
‘There is no helping me,’ he growled between the flickers of his tongue on mine, wrapping his arms around me so tightly that the flesh he was hugging was about to bruise on his track.
Maybe I was insane myself, but I didn’t want him to stop. I couldn’t even think about him stopping as the rush of him was drugging me on the spot. It was like falling into a dark abyss, plunging into danger but somehow craving to do it.
I wished I didn’t know better, but I could feel the taste on his lips. Toxic, like the most venomous snake, sending out his poison to consume right down to the very last piece of me.
He was chaotic, and at the same time incredibly determined, raising my body on his hips and entrapping me between him and the wall. Supporting me there so he could find my lips in decadent pleasure, roaring sweet lies to glide within me through the cracked pieces of my soul. ‘I need you. I need you like never before.’
But I was stupid enough to believe him, helping him break an innocence that could never be put back together again, I still loved him at an unconscious level, and against his own warning, still trying to heal his soul. Little did I know, he needed to still have a soul in the first place so I could try and heal it.
‘Ferris, tell me what’s wrong, please,’ I insisted, hoping that maybe there was a way to get through to him. I guess the fool never learned.
‘Nothing is wrong now that you’re here,’ he spoke between ghosted breaths, running his thumb over my cheekbone, then securing a hand to the back of my head.
I couldn’t trust what he said. Indeed, everything seemed incredibly wrong, falling into an abyss of fabricated illusions, so magically charged with every single emotion brewing between us. And that made it seem so dangerously right.
The constant on and off between me and my kings must’ve caused it, altering my senses of perception, changing my perspective of the reality so much I couldn’t tell what was what anymore. The games, hidden feelings, the ambiguous confessions— everything concluding into a fog engulfing my world, making me get lost in the moment while missing out on the picture as a whole.
As if trying to bring me back to earth, his fist fell on the wall right next to me. The vibration of the impact was so strong that it reverberated throughout my entire body. ‘Ferris!? Ferris, what’s happening?’ I asked again, wrapping my arms around his broad neck and fusing my lips to trace the line of his jaw.
And surprisingly, this time I did receive an answer, ‘I need to take my mind off everything. I need to stop the memories,’ his forehead fell to lean on mine as if he was trying to be rid even of a little part of his pain.
I would have taken it all on myself, if only it could have been that easy.
‘Just come back to me. Be here with me, in this moment,’ I whispered, pressing my mouth on his, in the hope of giving him the distraction he so desperately needed.
Only it wasn’t a distraction that he craved for. It was madness taken to the extreme.
He never wanted to join me. He wantedmeto join him.
Ferris needed to break something, other than objects, so he could finally feel safe.
So, he chose tobreak me.
With a rushed gesture, he caught the back of my head in a tight grip, forcing me to look straight into the pitch-black color of his eyes. His monsters were all there again, surfacing one by one with one single goal— to destroy me.
I didn’t have time to react as he drove his hands beneath my knees, securing me on his waist, and began walking towards the double glass balcony door.
‘What are you doing!?’ I asked with a trembling voice, even though I knew exactly what he was doing.
‘I need this,’ he spoke with madness on the tip of his tongue, striding with me straddled on his hips towards the ledge. ‘I’ve got you. All you have to do is trust me.’
The most impossible request. I could do anything he asked except trust him. That I couldn’t do ever again.
My body turned to stone against his own the second I felt the cold rim nudging on my calves. Then the coldness spread towards the back of my upper legs and higher to my posterior as he gently placed me on the edge of the railing. ‘Ferris, stop it,’ I begged, hoping that my plea would break the veil that was clouding his mind.
It didn’t.
He was so much more lost than I could ever realize, ‘I can’t. I need this,’ he answered in a dying murmur, with such agony that I was one step away from believing this could be his only salvation.
His salvation—my destruction.
With the hunger of the predator, he ripped the top of my dress apart so he could discover the round shapes of my breasts. A snarl escaped his throat at the encounter, biting his bottom lip with uncontained lust right before he could unclasp my bra and reveal my quivering tips. His gaze was raw, visceral, waiting an extra second to visually feast on his meal before going in for the kill.
I felt his grip on my back loosening just a little the second he drove his lips to search for the sweetness of my nipples. The movement startled me, waking me from my petrified trance and bringing me to wrap my arms around his neck while his mouth began moving over the tips of my breasts.
I think it was freezing outside but somehow the atmosphere seemed to be one step away from catching on fire. Every cell within me was brewing either with monstrous fear or with the anguishing throbbing produced by the adrenaline rushing through my veins. His lips were dancing with the intensity of a storm as his teeth were grazing painfully into my skin, testing that thin line again between agony and ecstasy.
