Page 2 of Kings of Desire
Though herend of timewas much sooner than anyone predicted. She died a year and a half ago, leaving me, Nat, and Sebastian alone in the cruelest of worlds. The three Musketeers who neither distance nor time can ever divide. Just me. I was the one dividing us.
I broke off from Nat’s embrace and disappeared into the night. I couldn’t stay a second longer because the fear and regret buried so deep within me were moments away from preventing me from taking another step further. The thought of leaving them behind, of abandoning them with a monster was twisting in my stomach, making me almost throw up.
My feet felt heavy...my soul felt heavier, but I needed to go on.
It was our only chance.
Iwas our only chance.
Things weren’t always like this, not back when my mother was still alive. We used to be happy, well as happy as anyone could be these days.
The world has changed, or so my mother used to say,because I only got to know thenowversion of it. The sky is always dark, reflecting itself onto everyone’s soul while a small ray of sunshine is a luxury most of us will never benefit from. The heavy smog, the unsatisfied basic needs, the poverty, and the pain all converge into a molten hate, consuming everyone from the inside out.
We were once the last remnants of a fading middle class. My mother was the direct descendent of a baroness and that still opened certain doors, as long as she was alive. But now we were rock bottom. Our father -and when I say father it’s with a mountain of disgust and regret because we could hardly call him that- well, he never worked a single day in his life.
It didn’t affect us whilst growing up because my late mother used to provide well beyond what any other low-classed family ever could, but after her demise, the effects were devastating. He couldn’t get a job, not that he would have wanted one anyway, instead, as a resolution to his problems, ourbeloved dadwas forcing us to provide the daily basics. The daily basics plus a few extra dimes for him and his drug addict friends.
I can’t say that he didn’t love our mother. He did, but just her. He loathed us, considering that weforcedher to shred some of the time spent with him to raise us. We were her greatest blessing and his greatest curse.
The shock of her sudden death changed him completely to the point he became inhuman. From the grieving man left with three young children, he had become an exploiter, using me and my sister to beg for money and food. But who was to spare any if no one had enough for themselves?
My brother, Sebastian got away from my father’sspecial treatmentsfor now, mostly because he is only six and his health problems don’t allow him to venture off too far. My father couldn’t risk losing him, especially since having Sebastian’s legal custody was providing him with a few dusty dollars each month.
In a way, I was glad he was sick. I know that this must sound like the most horrible thing to say, but his illness exempted him from much worse things.
The beatings- the punches and blows received every time paranoia got the better of our father and he suspected that we were keeping a part of our daily earnings.
The cold- the freezing winter cold that infiltrated down to the bone marrow while having to walk around half a city each day, dressed merely in rags, so you could receive people’s mercy.
The heat- the damp summer heat descending from beneath the clouds, melting the soles of our shoes into the asphalt. That is if we were lucky enough for him to allow us to even wear shoes.
The humiliation- knowing that you are worthless, just a shadow that floats through murky streets, hoping you never run into someone you know. That, until the day you begin wishing that no one would knowyou, that no-one would seeyou. That until you become invisible to everyone –Yourselfincluded.
And if things weren’t bad enough for us, he thought about turning all of this into a new business deal. His little minions, working day and night to fill out his greedy pockets.
Initially, when I heard him talking about it, I didn’t think he had it in him. I mean he never went through with a plan in his life. Why start now?
But I was wrong.
His dickhead friends convinced him it was time for them to become entrepreneurs, so the one neuron wandering their minds decided to start with the modern slaves’ branch of his business.
People had so little hope these days that they would do anything for a piece of bread,or a miserable roof over their heads- and he became best at exploiting that!
I knew where this was going and human trafficking was just the next step of his scheme. You can guess who would be first on his list since he would stop at nothing to get what he wants, and money was his ultimate goal after all.
I wanted to run away and search for a new beginning for the three of us from day one, but the college year paid in advance by my mother before she died, stopped me from going through with my plan. She used to place a great value on education, and always made efforts to ensure that I and my siblings would receive one.
My father even tried to get a refund on my college fees. Fortunately, he was turned down. Not that he would let me attend the classes anyway, but still, I managed somehow to do it behind his back.
With some of my teacher’s permission, I continued my studies. I used to take most of my courses from distance,helped by the notes of a couple of other students, as I only had to show up for the exams. I managed to pass the year, but it was next to impossible for me to pay for the following one. Not in the same city as my father anyway.
The truth was, he was paranoid about me and Nat hiding money for a good reason. I managed to raise enough to get me through one month’s rent and the first installment for the final year of college. That was the main motivator for running away. I needed to finish my education to have any chance of providing for us.
And there was a single location I had in mind!
I heard the rumors of a place where people were having a superior level of life, finding better jobs, and obtaining the so-needed daily basics much easier. That was mygreat opportunity.
How wrong was I!?
