Page 79 of Rider Forbidden
I make my way home to relieve Denny of his babysitting duties, knowing I won't sleep a wink all night with five hundred emotions rushing through my brain.
Chapter23
Robyn
Eli comes rushing in and jumps on my bed. “Mummy, mummy, its race day! Hooray!”
I groan and roll over, cuddling into Eli, it's our morning ritual. I look over at the clock, five-thirty in the morning, that’s even earlier than usual. It's going to be a long day before this race, I have a feeling Eli is going to ask every two minutes if it’s time to go.
“Is it time to go soon, mummy?”
I groan inwardly. I hate it when I'm right.
“No sweetie, we have breakfast, then we’ll do something this morning, then lunch, then we go to the track - so not for a while yet, but don't worry, we won't miss it.”
He looks disappointed. “That’s ages away.”
“It'll soon come. Let's watch a few episodes ofFireman Samin bed before we get up, we'll have a cuddle, does that sound good?”
“Fireman Sam? In bed . . . before breakfast?”
I nod, I never suggest that, but I was right about getting no sleep, I tossed and turned all night, so many thoughts going through my head.
“Hooray! Best day ever!”
I hope he’s right.
We watch a couple of episodes then eat breakfast - we’re ready to face the day . . . whatever that may hold. If dad comes through and speaks to Jack, does that mean that Jack and I, that we maybe could be together? Give us a go, out in the open, no secrets? It seems like a pipe dream and it doesn't take back all the mean things Jack said to me. Oh, I don't know. Could he have said all those things so I wouldn't try to talk him out of it, or is that wishful thinking? If he can be so nasty - even acting - do I want the possibility that he could be like that with me again? He was so jealous last week, part of me, the part that we're not supposed to admit to, liked it, and part of me is enraged by it. I don't even know what I'm feeling.
At nine we get visitors. Mum and dad. I don't say anything I let them in and Eli goes running to them.
“Grandad, are you coming to the race today?” Eli knows dad is involved somehow, he just doesn't understand how.
Dad nods. “Yes, but I need to go down to the track this morning.” He looks at me pointedly.
Mum says to Eli “What’s say you and I go to the park this morning while Mummy and Grandad sort something out at the track?”
I look at dad. “Dad?”
“Come on, we have someplace to be, don't we?”
Relief floods me that he’s going to do the right thing, albeit under duress, but at least he’s doing it.
I grab my bag. “You be good for Nana OK?” I look at mum, “You'll lock up mum?”
“I will.” She leans into me “Go get your man.”
Excitement floods my body when she says that, at the possibility that I might actually be able to be with Jack again.
I get in dad’s car and we make the journey in a quiet and awkward silence.
“I'm sorry Robyn. I can't seem to help it where you're concerned. But I love you so much, I just can't seem to let go.”
“You have to, I'm twenty-four, a mother. You have to let that sink in or you're going to lose me.”
He sighs. “I know, and I know I have some making up to do, especially with the way I treated Jack.”
I close my eyes, maybe he won't want anything to do with me after being faced with my dad. Great.
