Page 49 of A Christmas Baby for the Cowboy
“I thought you might say that,” Knox said.
And it was a funny thing to know exactly what was supposed to happen. To finally be completely and utterly clear on what his life was meant to be.
To know that this woman wasn’t only his heart, she was his clarity. She was the reason for everything.
He was going to have to live with that no matter what happened here.
Knox stopped stalling, went down on one knee, and knelt before her, watching her blue eyes widen. “I wanted to do this properly. I thought I needed to make a plan, go to Bozeman, and find something at least half as spectacular as you. But then I figured you would think that was bullshit too. A whole lot of smoke and mirrors when you still didn’t know if you could trust me to tell the truth about what’s happening between us.”
He reached into his pocket and pulled out a small item he’d tucked in there. It wasn’t in a pretty box. It was a dainty-looking ring made of hammered metal, twisted to form a unique shape. It almost looked like a stethoscope.
“Your father made that,” Ramona said then, and her voice sounded thick.
“He did.” Knox turned it over in his hand, admiring the workmanship. “He told me that when Kendall had it out in the booth at the market this summer, you picked it up every time you went by. And when I asked him about it tonight, and asked him if he’d sold it, he laughed at me. He told me that it had never been for sale. I thought that meant he’d given it away, but he hadn’t.” He moved the ring this way and that, letting the shiny metal catch the light, and make it bounce. “What he told me, Ramona, was that it’s been yours all along.”
What Zeke had actually said was that he had given up hoping that Knox would ever stop being a fool, and had spent months wondering if he would be better off melting the ring back down.
Is that a yes or no? Knox had asked, eyeing his prickly old father, who, he couldn’t help but notice, looked remarkably fit for someone who should really have been at death’s door. Are you going to give it to me? Or do I have to beg?
I think some begging would do you good, Zeke had replied. But I’m not the audience.
Then he’d led Knox out to his workshop in the barn across the cold yard, and had found the ring. He’d given it a polish, completely unconcerned that Knox had somewhere to be.
You’ve always had to do everything the hard way, boy, Zeke had said while he worked. You might be the most stubborn Carey that ever was, and that’s saying something.
You say that like you haven’t met all the other Careys, Knox retorted.
Your brothers gave you a hard time, so you give yourself a harder time. Zeke hadn’t even looked up. He was too busy with the ring. In my day, I would never have let a beautiful woman like that doctor cry over me. That’s the kind of woman you keep laughing, Knox. You keep her happy. Because she could do better than you with a snap of her fingers and why would you give her any reason to do that? I’m telling you, it’s the only way.
Knox shouldn’t have been surprised that his father seemed to know everything about his life. Zeke had always been that way. He’d always known things he shouldn’t.
He claimed he was simply observant, and maybe his children should try it on for size sometime.
The only way to what? Knox had asked.
The only way to you, Zeke had replied at once.
He’d handed over the ring, still warm from his hands. Knox closed his fingers around it, but he couldn’t seem to take his eyes away from his father’s.
To you, Zeke had said again. Because you’ve been so busy proving yourself to everyone and everything that I think you lost track of you somewhere. As far as I can tell, the only time you seem to find yourself again is when you’re with that Ramona.
This is exactly the kind of advice that might have been useful months ago, Knox had retorted.
Would it? the old man shot right back at him. Remind me when, exactly, in these past few months you were in a receptive mood to be told… anything?
Dad, Knox had said quietly. You’ve always made family look so easy.
Because it is, Zeke had replied gruffly. You just love them as loud and as hard as you can. And I promise you, the rest of it works itself out. One way or another.
And that had fueled Knox as he finally headed off the ranch and down through the little tangle of unmarked roads until he could climb his way up the hill to the Lodge.
What fueled him now was that look of shock and something like wonder on Ramona’s face.
He hadn’t really believed that he would ever see that again.
“I love you,” he said again now. “I’ve spent most of my life doing my best to be completely invulnerable. I never thought I had a choice. If I told my brothers this, they would hate themselves, but I did what I thought I had to do to defend against them and then it became who I am.” He shook his head. “And then you turned up and made it clear that I had no defenses against you whatsoever.”
“That’s not how I remember it,” she whispered.
