Page 76 of The Vows We Keep
“You make it sound easy.”
I tip her chin and kiss her softly. “I know it can feel impossible. With ADHD, sometimes I find getting out of bed impossible because the options for the day are overwhelming. Is now the right time to get up? Am I still tired? What time did I go to bed? If I get up, am I getting dressed first or getting coffee, or should I shower because I might not get the chance later? The more options that are spread out in front of me, the more difficult it is to make a decision. Some days, my brain revs so far ahead of me and everyone else, I say shit that should come out five minutes from now and confuse the fuck out of everyone, including myself. I don’t mean to make it sound easy. But how you solve the problem of being lost is different than how you solve the problem of being indecisive or stuck. If you at least call it the right the thing, you’ll stand a fighting chance of coming up with a solution.”
Catalina says nothing, but I can tell she’s thinking about what I just said. Meanwhile, my head whirs. Did I say too much? Am I out of line? Will what I said make her dislike me? Am I pushing her?
No.
I didn’t tell her I want her to stay in New Jersey. That I want more time to figure out what this is between us. I didn’t tell her I’m catching feelings and want to know if she is too.
I’m falling in love with the man you are, Niro.
Those were the words she said to me before I bailed on impulse and rode to see Rae. I want to hear Catalina say them again.
She turns on the stairs and places her knees on the first step in front of me. Her palms smooth a line back and forth along my thighs. My cock is highly interested in the gesture, and I will her to slide those palms a little higher.
“In that case, I’m stuck and don’t know what to do next.”
“Have you ever considered talking to someone?” I ask.
Catalina wipes beneath her eyes. “Like who you spoke to tonight?”
“Yeah. King’s old lady, Rae.”
“Why would I want to talk to an old lady?”
“Because Rae is ... ” I pause for a moment to think of the word. We met the day King decided to kidnap her. Crassly, I offered to fuck her. I didn’t even want to, but I just said it in the moment. Now she barely tolerates me, but I actually respect her. And I see the way she handles King. He’s a better leader now because Rae is ... “She’s intuitive. A fully qualified therapist who seems to know how to reach people. She knows what goes on in this club. Saint is her brother. She understands the rules of keeping confidence. She’s the person I went to speak to.”
“I don’t think a therapist can treat both halves of a couple. Isn’t there conflict of interest or something?”
I shrug. “So, talk to her as a friend. She takes no bullshit either.”
“Has she killed anyone?” Catalina raises one eyebrow.
“Two that I know of. In one night. Defending King.”
“Wow. Okay. I have a bit more respect for her.”
I can’t help but laugh at that. “The fact she has a bunch of degrees and letters after her name and is super fucking smart and—by the way, some kind of Shakespeare wizard—means nothing. But that fact she gunned down two people makes you like her.”
She pushes against my thigh playfully. “For the record, I’d probably kill someone if they went after you.”
“That’s a hot image to plant in my brain, babe. You ever do that for me, and I’ll probably keep you in bed for a three-day fuck-fest straight after.”
Now Catalina laughs, and the sound eases some of the tightness in my chest. “If I kill someone for you, then you owe me at least four days.”
“Done. Next?”
“I need to avenge my father.”
“Again, done.”
“It’s as simple as that?”
I nod. “It’s as simple as that.”
Catalina looks down for a moment, then glances back up at me through dark lashes. “Thank you.”
“What for?”
